the roof is on fire

A good teacher is priceless. And I do believe that it takes a community to raise a child, especially these days where there aren’t many good parents left in Canada. In middle school I would visit my primary school teachers. In high school my friend Corey and I would visit our middle school teachers. In college I would visit my high school teachers. I’m still friends with some of them, and a lot of them are in the retirement stage. I fear for them though, because even though most of them are in a stage of retirement, the ones who are left might be fired for what is being called politically incorrect or intolerance. Back in my days teachers were in charge of the kids and allowed to teach and say whatever they wanted to say if it would raise up good men and women. For example our gym teacher Mr. K taught us about being responsible, my English teacher Mrs. Bell taught us to wait till we are married to have sex. Today she might be forced to hand out condoms. Today the kids are in charge and the teachers can only say what is politically correct, even if it’s wrong. And because of this I fear that many of Canada’s children will grow up to be wimps. I think the bully problem will get worst and based on what I see on the net, things are getting worst in society.

Anyway about 10 years ago Corey and I visited Mr. Morris and incredibly, not only did he still remember me but he still had an unfinished project of mine tucked away near his desk. He pulled it out from his files and asked me to finish it. I told him no lol but I was amazed that he had my unfinished homework.

He taught me several life lessons I still use to this day:

– Sometimes rules need to be broken. Middle school had a serious rule that only 1 person per class was allowed to go to the bathroom at a time. One day one of our classmates was moving away to Kingston Ontario and was crying, Mr. Morris let her go to the bathroom with a girlfriend. He said no at first, then said yes when he saw her crying.

– Get a different perspective on problems when you are stumped. He would do this thing where he would write a complicated problem on the chalk board and pretend he was solving it with us. He would pretend he didn’t know the answer, get up from his desk and go stand in a bizarre corner of the classroom. He’s say something like “I need to see this problem from a different angle.” I still do this to this day.

Now here’s one of the real reasons I really liked him: At that time in life, grade 8, I didn’t know anything about computers, I used to make fun of people who had them, “oh hi I’m Asif, I’m a genius, I have a computer, I can help you with your taxes.” is what I used to say to people who had computers. Many of my classmates had them though. Mr. Morris would ask me to fix computers and it got me out of class. I don’t know if he thought I knew about computers, because I didn’t, I rarely ever touched them at the time. It could have been some kind of lesson he was trying to teach me. But I would learn all about it because the more computers I could fix for the school, the more class time I could avoid. I ended up fixing just about every computer at that school, while getting full class credit.

He is on my list of favorite teachers. Of course today he can’t pull those kinds of stunts. Kids like me would be heavily medicated and given false disabilities. He would simply be fired for giving too much homework or for pushing kids too hard. Teachers are no longer in charge, it’s nut job parents and kids who are in charge, and if their children don’t want to do their homework, the parents just complain till the teacher gets fired. Get their children falsely diagnosed with some fake disability and over-medicated. I see parents all the time who complain that their child has ADHD, when really they are just bad parents and their child is spoiled rotten. Okay, obviously some of the kids have real disabilities, but every reasonable adult knows that most people fake it. Go ahead, ask your doctor.

The last day of Lancaster middle school was filled with action, one of the local dope smokers lit the school on fire, apparently starting with the massive stage curtains in the gym. Turns out that now many years later the school will undergo a massive renovation.

A few years later in high school when I was walking up Airport Road back to Malton, this same kid caught up with me for a chat. He lived in one of the newer, nicer houses and had a lot of toys. People told me he was basically a spoiled brat who was always on playtime. He ruined that last day of school for us, my backpack had some of my prized possessions inside at a time in life when I didn’t have very much at all. It was lost due to the fire.

Fast forward to when I was in high school, he was coming home from his probation meeting or something like that and I was coming home from job hunting. I considered pushing him off the sidewalk into traffic but during the long walk with him I thought it through. Too many witnesses first of all, but more than that, I felt sorry for him. He was a real loser. Today I hope and pray that he’s doing better.

Today I woke up, had some tea, read the bible, worshiped, spent time in prayer, then I worked to around 530pm, then did some errands. For dinner I had a salad and a cheeseburger from Mcdonalds. As a treat I have cotton candy. Now I’m typing up this journal and hopefully I’ll watch some tv tonight, go out for a prayer walk and be ready for bed around 11. Almost every day I’ve been doing a lot of biking riding all over the trans Canada trail and Malton with Mason and Eggbert. Sometimes we invite others along and it’s really fun. One time we went to Woodbine Centre after to get Chinese food and another time we went to Popeye’s at Albion Road to get biscuits. I like getting discount clothing from Albion Mall. They have track suits there for $8.

I have this box of precious memories, I call it my treasure chest. My grandma would usually throw out every good thing I had, so it was a struggle to keep certain things hidden within the furniture of my bedroom. I’ve amassed a small box with hundreds of little important trinkets that I like to look at. I’ve been keeping them in a secure location the last few years, I have them with me again. This month I’ve been looking through it, organizing it as best I can. There’s my stamp collection, stock certificate collection, old currency collection, fathers day cards to me. Photos, old video tape, there’s notes written to me by children that say “I love you Asif” or “Asif I wish you were my dad”, drawings, old letters, report cards that say “Asif can do better.” If those teachers would have spent a few nights at my house they would have given me straight A’s.

My neighbor across the hall does Tae Kwon Do. She seems to get locked out of her apartment often. On May 13 I invented a really good lemon chicken recipe. I own 2 pairs of shoes and I’m happy with that.

On May 29, Mason and I did our longest bike riding adventure so far. 7 hours in total, we rode from Malton to Harbor front in Toronto. We used the Trans Canada trail, riding through forests and so on, so it wasn’t a direct route. We didn’t ride for speed, but for enjoyment. When we got to harbor front we took a break, ate a hot dog from a street vendor, and then started the ride back. I saw chipmunks up close for the first time, and there was a shot my camera couldn’t get – we were riding through a forest, on a dirt path, something like you’d see in a movie. The sunlight pierced through the trees and it looked like beams of light shining through. We got back after dark. Talk about work out. Talk about fun.

The mission takes priority

When I was in high school I was not in the in crowd. I was mostly a loner with too much responsibility to notice what was going on around me. I was also in the video club, and the nerd club which was fine with me. One day I got an invite to a cool people party. I can’t remember what cool thing I did to get this invite, I think it had something to do with beating up a dirt bag that was mistreating a girl. If you know me you know that I don’t go to parties. Never have, never will. I did stop by this one to see what it was like because a girl asked me to take her there safely. It’s just like what you see in the movies with the booze and the making out and silly behavior. Super hot high school girls ruining their lives one boy at a time. Fast forward though to today and the people I knew from that party are mostly doing nothing with their lives. I do stop and chats with some of them at the mall and it’s just sad. Today I met one of them in a convenience store at the Westwood Mall and asked him what he’s been up and he said “staying high”.

Several times in my life, I have learned that the in crowd is the sin crowd. They are the crowd that most people strive to attain membership in, but the worst crowd to be a part of. Everything looks good on the outside. Smiles, friendship, even fun and love. But it’s not real. It doesn’t last. It breaks down. It’s not worth it. Plenty of backstabbing, plenty of gossip. Everyone wants everyone else to fail.

I’m trying out this new thing called digital cable. Basically you have a box you attach to your tv and you get more channels, plus movies on demand and special content. After enjoying it for a few days I was reminded that America has had similar technology for a while, maybe not digital though, in fact I rented a movie on demand back in the late 80’s or early 90’s in New York City. To my recollection it was either something with Hulk Hogan or Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Why is Canada behind on these things? And why do companies market their technology as new when it’s been in existence and use for a long time? I don’t mean this about the digital cable but everything.

I watched my friend C give his life to Jesus in the late 90’s. I think 1998 or 1999. At the time he was about 6ft tall and maybe 275+ lbs. (dude if you’re reading this and I’m wrong about your weight, I’m so sorry) I was sitting way at the back and he walked from the very back all the way down the isle during an emotional church service, and fell down on the ground at the alter. He was crying hard. When others saw this they started crying. K brought him to church, I think that was his first time. Later we would be camping in Bancroft and we shared a tent. While I was trying to sleep, my other friend L came into the tent, and her and C chatted the night away. It wouldn’t be much long after that for them to get married, and I stood near him at his wedding as a groomsmen / usher. Fast forward to now, on April 4th I visited that old church again and took photos with C and L and their new baby boy. I held him while they took photos of me to. It was nice visiting with good friends that I haven’t seen for a long time. We all took photos and it was like I was always there this whole time. When God calls you away to do other things, it’s both exciting and terrible. But all in all everything will come full circle, in heaven we’ll all be back together again. The mission takes priority.

When I share the gospel with people, it’s just random people. Sometimes it leads to nothing because a person isn’t interested. Other times it leads to a person converting and living for Jesus, other times it leads to death threats including fists, knives and guns. From drug dealers who lost paying customers to bad husbands who’ve lost their punching bag, not everyone is happy to see people convert and be set free.

I remind myself, the mission takes priority. The mission takes priority.

Night time prayer time is my favorite prayer time

My morning time prayers are important and a foundation for my life. But sometimes they can be rushed, especially depending on my schedule. My night time prayers are usually my favorite. I spend a good hour at least and I’m not rushed or stressed because it’s the end of the day. I find that the better I pray, the better I sleep and the better I wake up. The better I live.

I realized that in recent years that I’ve been talking about regaining my fitness, and now realize that I’ve been trying to regain my youth. Specifically my youthful energy and vitality. I’m aging, and I confused it with being out of shape. It’s true that I’m out of shape but that’s not the real issue. I have wrinkles, droopy elbow skin, and thinning gray hair. There’s no going back from this, I’ll just learn to enjoy it. At the gym this dude said “Asif give me some tips, how did you get that chest?”. Somehow I dumbbell pressed my way to a ripped and larger than average chest muscles which I’ll enjoy while I can because they say that it’ll start to get saggy after a while and turn into man boobs.

My neighbor, a man, got ultra massive pec implants. I don’t know how he found a doctor to put in such big implants. And I get it, hitting the gym every day is hard and doesn’t always take us to our goals. But he’s got a normal thin / athletic frame and a terminator chest. He walks around town shirtless. Everyone just gawks because it looks so incredibly unrealistic, like a special effect.

At the rate I’m going, I won’t finish my bachelors degree for years, lol, but at least I’m doing it debt free. My friends make fun of me but at least I’m doing it, and I’m paying as I go so I won’t have student loans. I was advised today that since I don’t have a high school diploma, (I dropped out around age 15 or 16) I’ll have go take a GED exam so I can then be granted my degree. Doh!

The last time I was in high school, the teachers were giving me money because my team was replacing their old computers for really really good new ones. I was wearing sneakers, bluejeans and a suit jacket with the label still on the cuff. A science teacher told me that had to be cut off. My English teacher, concerned about me dropping out asked me if I was earning at least $100,000 / year, which I was not. I did have a job offer on the table for $60,000 and it wouldn’t be long after and I would be offered a job of $80,000. It would be a good long while before I would see $100,000 / year. But I was happy.

Old things can lead to new things, new things can lead to old things

In Guyana, I slept on a real bed with my grandmother. Her house cost her $500 USD cash back in the 50’s and is still standing strong today. Maybe some Canadian construction companies can learn a thing or two? When we moved to Canada, I slept on the floor for the first few years. I had a sponge to sleep on and it was perfectly fine. When I turned 7 years old I got my first bed. I gave that bed away a while back, and I’m now sleeping on the floor again which is very enjoyable for me.

My friends call me a minimalist. I like to give away my things and have the least amount of possessions as humanly possible. I don’t even like having multiple pens.

I’m at the gym 5 days a week even in the winter. I walked through like a foot of snow and ice cold wind to get to the gym, which has been moved to the other side of town while renovations are happening at the main location. One of the long time trainers was there and I asked her for some advise, she complimented my little muscles. Yes, I will be extending my membership!

I helped Mason with his job hunting, writing his resume and handing it out with him in many places. He got a job at Woodbine Centre, specifically he helps a woman’s lingerie / underwear department. He’s as happy as can be and all I hear from him is about how great his job is. He text messages me to tell me about how happy he is to be walking to his job (he even goes early), he texts me during breaks to tell me about his adventures, he even stays late after work. He goes on and on about the beautiful women he helps all day and night. I’ve never heard anyone speak so happily about their job. I haven’t achieved this yet. Most people haven’t. Most people aren’t super excited to go to work, most don’t stay late on purpose.

I visited him there, well, I went there to spy on him, and the dude was helping women choose lingerie with a huge smile on his face. I watched him smile for like a good 10 minutes straight. I was laughing because I thought it was hilarious, and I was at awe at how this young man had reached such a great level of happiness so fast. I’ve known him about 7 years and never seen him smile so much. Most of us will never reach that level of happiness at a job, or at anything, ever.

So the consulting project I’m working on right now will provide me with an income for 2 years. Not a big income, but enough to pay my rent, car, gas, phone, insurance, etc and several decent sized missions projects. I’m also going to try to do a big project along side this one and see if I can get a small bank to like my idea. Problem is it won’t actually pay me for like 4 more months which is making things really tight around here. Another risk is that I won’t get paid at all, this has happened several times and leads to great discouragement. Nobodies fault, that’s just the way it is. I’ve consulted for companies that have gone under part way though, and I didn’t find out till I visited the office to see the eviction notice on the door. Other times I’ll find out that the company I’m working with / for has been purchased by another company and all the previous management fired or replaced – and they have no idea who I am. And yes once in while things will work out better than expected and I’ll do better than expected and get paid more than expected.

I’m still in the beginning stages of this project which involves making a lot of phone calls, I’m on the phone almost all day doing my research, which is annoying but still better than traveling. My little suitcase is gathering dust, I like that. Maybe one day soon I can give it away to.

Most of my friends have internet access now. So we all chat online after work. It’s so different. No waiting weeks or even months for letters to arrive in the mail from my missionary friends, or phone calls at hours with static connections. They are basically in countries all over the world which makes communication difficult. Pretty much all of them have some form of internet access now. Time zones aren’t even such a bother anymore. One of my friends doing missions in the Ukraine got spat on, simply because she was there and the person didn’t like Christians. I’m currently trying to gain steam on an Orphanage in the Ukraine, at the rate I’m going this project will be done, realistically by the year 2015. I started it in 2001. It breaks my heart but it’s the best I can do. I hate that so much but it’s out of my hands. Some projects move fast, some move slow.

If Frodo can do it then so can we

Yeah I watched part 3. I got the books for Christmas as well but I can’t read the books after I watch the movie. Spoiler alert: Frodo did it. He completed his quest and lived happily ever after. Find out from God what your quest is, then spend your life on it. Heaven is your happily ever after.

The past couple of years for me has been almost non stop adventure and bizarre circumstances, one after another. 2003 was an awesome roller coaster, I spend today looking at my journals for the year. There aren’t very many because I’ve been so busy doing so much. Moving into 2004, I’m hoping for like, no adventure. Just a nice boring existence. Winter has set in nice and good and I’m enjoying it.

In Canada, there is talk about legalizing drugs. I don’t care if we do, as long as whoever does drugs doesn’t expect society to pay for their mistakes. I talked to my doctor about doing anabolic steroids just to try them out, and after getting his good advise, I tried some.
This was last year – I did a very short, 2 week cycle of testosterone precursors called androstenedione or something like that. Why did I do it? Call it youthful curiosity. I wanted to see what would happen. Maybe I just wanted a boost.

When I was a teen I setup a makeshift gym and fight club in my garage, people from the neighborhood would come to fight or lift weights. We didn’t have any good equipment, a home made squat rack, a portion of a skid for calf raises. Different sizes of plastic weights. I filled a large US Army issued carryall bag part way with sand and we used that as a punching bag, when we weren’t using each other for punching bags. People would come over asking for me and my grandmother would use her fists to do a boxing motion and would say “asif is boxing, he’s boxing”.

The dealer I bought the stuff from was the size of a bear and he said the stuff works – and boy did it. Strength and endurance went up through the roof almost right away. I think I did over 100 full pushups and 25 full pullups and went about my day like it was nothing. I can’t believe this stuff is completely legal in America. I bet that lots of young people will start to do steroids. At the 2 week point I started to feel like it would turn me into a flesh eating zombie so I threw out the rest of the supply and lost most of my gains. My doctor (who I spoke to through this whole process), laughed and laughed. He told me that when I’m much older, in my 50’s that I should ask him again, and maybe we can do it properly and in a way that actually benefits me permanently.

Which brings me to my Merry Christmas and Happy new Year message: Sometimes it’s a good idea to abandon your direction. Sometimes the plan sounds smart but will lead to stupid results. Sometimes the outcome isn’t worth the consequences. Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is to stop, and walk away. To give up doesn’t mean to lose. Sometimes the biggest losers are the ones who don’t know when to give up.

Family Reunion

Lets start off with me venting then conclude with something good.

Have you ever tried to do something good, and have it blow up in your face? This happens to me often, and I never seem to learn, and chances are I haven’t learned this time either. I helped someone get an apartment by paying first and last, 6 months of rent, signing my name for the apartment and helping them to move in.

The moving in was fun, because something good was being done for someone with a baby. I’ve done this many times before, and I will do this many times again. The apartment was nice, it did need an initial cleaning as most do, and in a crawl space were many empty beer bottles. Eggbert, and I packed what seemed to be 500 empty beer bottles into my car. We saw some grouchy church people pass us by holding all the beer bottles, shaking their heads. Later I would learn that a rumor was started that Eggbert and I were having a fling and that we were both drunkards.

Now for those of you who have never done this you’re thinking “ah, he shouldn’t have put up the money.” No. It’s the putting up my name where I shouldn’t have. This person over the course of 6 months has turned the apartment into a pile of poo-poo, like literally. I’ll explain more after. It started with the landlord calling me at all hours complaining that the tenant was not home, and the 2 year old baby was alone, crying. I couldn’t believe this to be true so I would go over to get some answers. I would get further calls of noise and dirty smells coming from the (basement) apartment, I would go over and get some answers. This got worst and worst until I got a call that the tenant had left, and that I should come over to see the apartment.

I went over, with 4 other friends, the same that helped move her in just a few months prior. Well, what we saw is something we are still talking about, something we’ll be talking about for a long time to come. A 800sq ft apartment turned into a garbage dump. Dirty baby diapers piled up into the bathtub (HOW DID YOU SHOWER?) and garbage everywhere. I mean, everywhere. I mean really everywhere. We brought 10 large garbage bags with us, and I had to go to the store to buy 40 more. Yes 40 more garbage bags.

There were some items we thought to be in good condition; particularly clothing and baby items and so we took those over to the goodwill donation truck at the Westwood Mall. The intake manager was delighted to get so much stuff all at once. It was such a stressful night that after I took everyone to Mandarin so I could drown my sorrows in shrimp and honey garlic ribs. A few days later we would read in the paper about a Mississauga goodwill donation that had to be burned because it caused the staff to get sick. We jokingly laugh, with a touch of fear that it could have been the donation we made.

The worst part of this story? The landlord told me she trusted me when she took in this tenant, and now she doesn’t trust me. I do this thing all the time. This year so far I’ve paid for 3 peoples first and lasts, 2 turned out very well and this one blew up in my face.

And now to some good stuff as promised. My friends invited me to go to their family reunion. I jumped at the opportunity because I’ve never been to a family reunion. I’ve seen them on tv in movies, but my family doesn’t do that kind of thing. This started off with a drive out to the country. A farm, maybe 10 acres or more. When we drove up I thought “wow look at this massive property.” Turned out that was simply the front yard. The backyard was 10x bigger and had several crops growing including corn which we would later pick, roast and eat.

We arrived rather early, and just helped with the cooking and the setup. One of my favorite things to do is walk around, so I walked around. I walked up and down that country road, enjoying the absolute nothing that was out there. Back at the property people were starting to arrive, young and old. The children wanted to play so we did some Frisbee games. I sat on a tractor. I had conversations.

Now it was the conversations that made this family reunion so much fun for me. So many different generations of family, from babies, to grandparents and I think there was a great grand parent as well.

God does the same thing for us. He invites everyone into His gigantic family which consists of all kinds of people of all ages and all backgrounds. Strangers are welcomed in and treated as family. And there’s lots of food :)

We spent the time talking and talking more, taking photographs, laughing, telling jokes. Someone told me they were going to propose to someone else, and then that someone else asked me what that someone said, but I won’t tell. I will be at the wedding though :)

Keeping my head above water

Okay so Peterborough last month was fun, so what happens when you do something fun? YOU DO IT AGAIN!

The trip started very early in the morning so we could get to Peterborough and do some major ditch digging. A friends house was being flooded constantly, and so several us would spend the better part of a day digging a ditch along one side of the property to run a proper drainage system so the water would run away from the house. The hardest part of this was hitting tree roots.

During breaks we did fun things – I played with the fattest and cutest dog in the world named Waketa, and I let Eggbert (age 13 or 14) steer my car while I push it down the street (the car was powered off and in neutral). I figured when I was her age I was already driving on the highway, she should at least get to sort of drive.

Waketa was in the back of the car and having a blast. I don’t know what kind of dog she was, a collie I think? Similar to Lassie. Except Waketa is super duper fat. She brought me a bottle of water while I was digging. Now that’s a good dog! Wouldn’t it be nice if all dogs were this great? Instead of just barking early in the morning or pooing all over the place.

After ditch digging was done, it was time to head on over to this other house for fun time. This house backed onto a lake, which as you know is one of my favorite things. We all swam and did a BBQ. The neighborhood children (2x 10 year old girls) came over to swim as well, and they both took a liking to me right away. I think it’s mostly because I’m super fun, and partially because I’m brown which is a huge novelty here. They were definitely country girls who’s lives consisted of swimming in the lake and the like. It was such a fun day and I wish I could do this kind of stuff everyday, even if I had to start it out with hard labor in the hot sun.

Actually I learned to swim today. When I was 6 years old someone held my head under water in the bathtub for a while, and my nose was already busted and bleeding badly so it sure helped me gain a fear of the water – so I haven’t taken the opportunity to learn how to swim. I mean in grade school our class would to go over to Westwood Secondary School to use their pool, but that was more of me and my friends spying on girls and getting out of class. Swimming in a lake is much different from being in a pool, the water feels endlessly deep and you feel like you’re a part of it. I can swim for like 50 feet with no problem, and it’s interesting how I just walked into the water slowly, and started swimming, as if I had been doing it my whole life.

Picture this: I was actually swimming with 2 young girls latched onto me, they were giggling and it was good exercise for me, even though I was already exhausted from ditch digging all day. Neighbors passed by on their boats waving to me, and I was invited by another neighbor to come over for a beer. The sun was starting to set, it was still nice and warm, the water was warm and I could smell bbq.

When we had to leave I simply didn’t want to, and neither did the 2 girls, who asked when I’d be coming back and wouldn’t let go of me. I wish I could do this more often, I wish this was my life!

Swinging in the rain

It has been raining lightly all
day so I figured I’d have the
park near the school all to
myself (or any park) for that
matter.

So I walked through the rain
to my fav park. Parked myself
on my fav swing and had some fun
in the rain :O) I wore my hood.

Had my walkman too. Listened to
some good music on the radio.

Walked back home.

Now its time for a nap.