In Guyana and the Carribean, there is a saying that “if you can’t hear, then you have to feel.”
My current diet consists of hot peppers. So I’m feeling.
Whenever I can get a few bucks together I go to Carlingwood Mall for a giant pretzels which is my favorite snack, and manchu woks which is now a very rare treat. A few days ago I purchased a loaf of bread with my pennies.
I say all this not to feel sorry for myself, but to remind myself of a much needed purge in my life. I feel like I need to be here, to do this, for a short while longer.
I went with my friend Melissa to pickup her 5 year old sister Margaret from school, Margaret is the tiniest 5 year old I’ve ever seen, she showed me that she can fit neatly inside her own backpack. Margaret has since been coming over to my apartment to play and entertain me with her fun jokes and games.
I find the teens in Ottawa rather rude. And there seem to be a lot of biker gang people especially close to the border of Quebec. I don’t know if any of this is true, but I’m stating how it seems to me.
There are rumors that what happened on September 11 will trigger a big war, which I hope it doesn’t. As much as I want America to figure out who did this and get them, I know that if it was really Muslim terrorists who did it, America needs to know that any war with them will be long, like really long. Religion is one of most long lasting fuels there is, and brute force can’t overcome it.
Ottawa is really cold. And I’m very discouraged and fighting off the flu and things just aren’t working out for me. I don’t remember what I was expecting here, any progress I make gives me no satisfaction.