the roof is on fire

A good teacher is priceless. And I do believe that it takes a community to raise a child, especially these days where there aren’t many good parents left in Canada. In middle school I would visit my primary school teachers. In high school my friend Corey and I would visit our middle school teachers. In college I would visit my high school teachers. I’m still friends with some of them, and a lot of them are in the retirement stage. I fear for them though, because even though most of them are in a stage of retirement, the ones who are left might be fired for what is being called politically incorrect or intolerance. Back in my days teachers were in charge of the kids and allowed to teach and say whatever they wanted to say if it would raise up good men and women. For example our gym teacher Mr. K taught us about being responsible, my English teacher Mrs. Bell taught us to wait till we are married to have sex. Today she might be forced to hand out condoms. Today the kids are in charge and the teachers can only say what is politically correct, even if it’s wrong. And because of this I fear that many of Canada’s children will grow up to be wimps. I think the bully problem will get worst and based on what I see on the net, things are getting worst in society.

Anyway about 10 years ago Corey and I visited Mr. Morris and incredibly, not only did he still remember me but he still had an unfinished project of mine tucked away near his desk. He pulled it out from his files and asked me to finish it. I told him no lol but I was amazed that he had my unfinished homework.

He taught me several life lessons I still use to this day:

– Sometimes rules need to be broken. Middle school had a serious rule that only 1 person per class was allowed to go to the bathroom at a time. One day one of our classmates was moving away to Kingston Ontario and was crying, Mr. Morris let her go to the bathroom with a girlfriend. He said no at first, then said yes when he saw her crying.

– Get a different perspective on problems when you are stumped. He would do this thing where he would write a complicated problem on the chalk board and pretend he was solving it with us. He would pretend he didn’t know the answer, get up from his desk and go stand in a bizarre corner of the classroom. He’s say something like “I need to see this problem from a different angle.” I still do this to this day.

Now here’s one of the real reasons I really liked him: At that time in life, grade 8, I didn’t know anything about computers, I used to make fun of people who had them, “oh hi I’m Asif, I’m a genius, I have a computer, I can help you with your taxes.” is what I used to say to people who had computers. Many of my classmates had them though. Mr. Morris would ask me to fix computers and it got me out of class. I don’t know if he thought I knew about computers, because I didn’t, I rarely ever touched them at the time. It could have been some kind of lesson he was trying to teach me. But I would learn all about it because the more computers I could fix for the school, the more class time I could avoid. I ended up fixing just about every computer at that school, while getting full class credit.

He is on my list of favorite teachers. Of course today he can’t pull those kinds of stunts. Kids like me would be heavily medicated and given false disabilities. He would simply be fired for giving too much homework or for pushing kids too hard. Teachers are no longer in charge, it’s nut job parents and kids who are in charge, and if their children don’t want to do their homework, the parents just complain till the teacher gets fired. Get their children falsely diagnosed with some fake disability and over-medicated. I see parents all the time who complain that their child has ADHD, when really they are just bad parents and their child is spoiled rotten. Okay, obviously some of the kids have real disabilities, but every reasonable adult knows that most people fake it. Go ahead, ask your doctor.

The last day of Lancaster middle school was filled with action, one of the local dope smokers lit the school on fire, apparently starting with the massive stage curtains in the gym. Turns out that now many years later the school will undergo a massive renovation.

A few years later in high school when I was walking up Airport Road back to Malton, this same kid caught up with me for a chat. He lived in one of the newer, nicer houses and had a lot of toys. People told me he was basically a spoiled brat who was always on playtime. He ruined that last day of school for us, my backpack had some of my prized possessions inside at a time in life when I didn’t have very much at all. It was lost due to the fire.

Fast forward to when I was in high school, he was coming home from his probation meeting or something like that and I was coming home from job hunting. I considered pushing him off the sidewalk into traffic but during the long walk with him I thought it through. Too many witnesses first of all, but more than that, I felt sorry for him. He was a real loser. Today I hope and pray that he’s doing better.

Today I woke up, had some tea, read the bible, worshiped, spent time in prayer, then I worked to around 530pm, then did some errands. For dinner I had a salad and a cheeseburger from Mcdonalds. As a treat I have cotton candy. Now I’m typing up this journal and hopefully I’ll watch some tv tonight, go out for a prayer walk and be ready for bed around 11. Almost every day I’ve been doing a lot of biking riding all over the trans Canada trail and Malton with Mason and Eggbert. Sometimes we invite others along and it’s really fun. One time we went to Woodbine Centre after to get Chinese food and another time we went to Popeye’s at Albion Road to get biscuits. I like getting discount clothing from Albion Mall. They have track suits there for $8.

I have this box of precious memories, I call it my treasure chest. My grandma would usually throw out every good thing I had, so it was a struggle to keep certain things hidden within the furniture of my bedroom. I’ve amassed a small box with hundreds of little important trinkets that I like to look at. I’ve been keeping them in a secure location the last few years, I have them with me again. This month I’ve been looking through it, organizing it as best I can. There’s my stamp collection, stock certificate collection, old currency collection, fathers day cards to me. Photos, old video tape, there’s notes written to me by children that say “I love you Asif” or “Asif I wish you were my dad”, drawings, old letters, report cards that say “Asif can do better.” If those teachers would have spent a few nights at my house they would have given me straight A’s.

My neighbor across the hall does Tae Kwon Do. She seems to get locked out of her apartment often. On May 13 I invented a really good lemon chicken recipe. I own 2 pairs of shoes and I’m happy with that.

On May 29, Mason and I did our longest bike riding adventure so far. 7 hours in total, we rode from Malton to Harbor front in Toronto. We used the Trans Canada trail, riding through forests and so on, so it wasn’t a direct route. We didn’t ride for speed, but for enjoyment. When we got to harbor front we took a break, ate a hot dog from a street vendor, and then started the ride back. I saw chipmunks up close for the first time, and there was a shot my camera couldn’t get – we were riding through a forest, on a dirt path, something like you’d see in a movie. The sunlight pierced through the trees and it looked like beams of light shining through. We got back after dark. Talk about work out. Talk about fun.

Old things can lead to new things, new things can lead to old things

In Guyana, I slept on a real bed with my grandmother. Her house cost her $500 USD cash back in the 50’s and is still standing strong today. Maybe some Canadian construction companies can learn a thing or two? When we moved to Canada, I slept on the floor for the first few years. I had a sponge to sleep on and it was perfectly fine. When I turned 7 years old I got my first bed. I gave that bed away a while back, and I’m now sleeping on the floor again which is very enjoyable for me.

My friends call me a minimalist. I like to give away my things and have the least amount of possessions as humanly possible. I don’t even like having multiple pens.

I’m at the gym 5 days a week even in the winter. I walked through like a foot of snow and ice cold wind to get to the gym, which has been moved to the other side of town while renovations are happening at the main location. One of the long time trainers was there and I asked her for some advise, she complimented my little muscles. Yes, I will be extending my membership!

I helped Mason with his job hunting, writing his resume and handing it out with him in many places. He got a job at Woodbine Centre, specifically he helps a woman’s lingerie / underwear department. He’s as happy as can be and all I hear from him is about how great his job is. He text messages me to tell me about how happy he is to be walking to his job (he even goes early), he texts me during breaks to tell me about his adventures, he even stays late after work. He goes on and on about the beautiful women he helps all day and night. I’ve never heard anyone speak so happily about their job. I haven’t achieved this yet. Most people haven’t. Most people aren’t super excited to go to work, most don’t stay late on purpose.

I visited him there, well, I went there to spy on him, and the dude was helping women choose lingerie with a huge smile on his face. I watched him smile for like a good 10 minutes straight. I was laughing because I thought it was hilarious, and I was at awe at how this young man had reached such a great level of happiness so fast. I’ve known him about 7 years and never seen him smile so much. Most of us will never reach that level of happiness at a job, or at anything, ever.

So the consulting project I’m working on right now will provide me with an income for 2 years. Not a big income, but enough to pay my rent, car, gas, phone, insurance, etc and several decent sized missions projects. I’m also going to try to do a big project along side this one and see if I can get a small bank to like my idea. Problem is it won’t actually pay me for like 4 more months which is making things really tight around here. Another risk is that I won’t get paid at all, this has happened several times and leads to great discouragement. Nobodies fault, that’s just the way it is. I’ve consulted for companies that have gone under part way though, and I didn’t find out till I visited the office to see the eviction notice on the door. Other times I’ll find out that the company I’m working with / for has been purchased by another company and all the previous management fired or replaced – and they have no idea who I am. And yes once in while things will work out better than expected and I’ll do better than expected and get paid more than expected.

I’m still in the beginning stages of this project which involves making a lot of phone calls, I’m on the phone almost all day doing my research, which is annoying but still better than traveling. My little suitcase is gathering dust, I like that. Maybe one day soon I can give it away to.

Most of my friends have internet access now. So we all chat online after work. It’s so different. No waiting weeks or even months for letters to arrive in the mail from my missionary friends, or phone calls at hours with static connections. They are basically in countries all over the world which makes communication difficult. Pretty much all of them have some form of internet access now. Time zones aren’t even such a bother anymore. One of my friends doing missions in the Ukraine got spat on, simply because she was there and the person didn’t like Christians. I’m currently trying to gain steam on an Orphanage in the Ukraine, at the rate I’m going this project will be done, realistically by the year 2015. I started it in 2001. It breaks my heart but it’s the best I can do. I hate that so much but it’s out of my hands. Some projects move fast, some move slow.

If Frodo can do it then so can we

Yeah I watched part 3. I got the books for Christmas as well but I can’t read the books after I watch the movie. Spoiler alert: Frodo did it. He completed his quest and lived happily ever after. Find out from God what your quest is, then spend your life on it. Heaven is your happily ever after.

The past couple of years for me has been almost non stop adventure and bizarre circumstances, one after another. 2003 was an awesome roller coaster, I spend today looking at my journals for the year. There aren’t very many because I’ve been so busy doing so much. Moving into 2004, I’m hoping for like, no adventure. Just a nice boring existence. Winter has set in nice and good and I’m enjoying it.

In Canada, there is talk about legalizing drugs. I don’t care if we do, as long as whoever does drugs doesn’t expect society to pay for their mistakes. I talked to my doctor about doing anabolic steroids just to try them out, and after getting his good advise, I tried some.
This was last year – I did a very short, 2 week cycle of testosterone precursors called androstenedione or something like that. Why did I do it? Call it youthful curiosity. I wanted to see what would happen. Maybe I just wanted a boost.

When I was a teen I setup a makeshift gym and fight club in my garage, people from the neighborhood would come to fight or lift weights. We didn’t have any good equipment, a home made squat rack, a portion of a skid for calf raises. Different sizes of plastic weights. I filled a large US Army issued carryall bag part way with sand and we used that as a punching bag, when we weren’t using each other for punching bags. People would come over asking for me and my grandmother would use her fists to do a boxing motion and would say “asif is boxing, he’s boxing”.

The dealer I bought the stuff from was the size of a bear and he said the stuff works – and boy did it. Strength and endurance went up through the roof almost right away. I think I did over 100 full pushups and 25 full pullups and went about my day like it was nothing. I can’t believe this stuff is completely legal in America. I bet that lots of young people will start to do steroids. At the 2 week point I started to feel like it would turn me into a flesh eating zombie so I threw out the rest of the supply and lost most of my gains. My doctor (who I spoke to through this whole process), laughed and laughed. He told me that when I’m much older, in my 50’s that I should ask him again, and maybe we can do it properly and in a way that actually benefits me permanently.

Which brings me to my Merry Christmas and Happy new Year message: Sometimes it’s a good idea to abandon your direction. Sometimes the plan sounds smart but will lead to stupid results. Sometimes the outcome isn’t worth the consequences. Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is to stop, and walk away. To give up doesn’t mean to lose. Sometimes the biggest losers are the ones who don’t know when to give up.

Jesus Heals

I took a trip to Peterborough Ontario, I haven’t been here since like 1999 or 2000 and the last time I was here, I didn’t get to stop and enjoy as much as I wanted, but this time I did. Now when I got out of the van, of course the button on my jeans flew right off. It got sewn up right there in the parking lot while they were still on me which gave all the onlookers something to talk about before service.

We went to this church that had free delicious orange drink and donuts that you could eat before, during and after service. I have never seen this before in my life and I think it’s just the greatest thing. Also the sermon started with a Jim Carey video clip on a projector screen and I have never seen this kind of technology used in a church before, just old fashioned overhead projectors and not even free water. After there was a question and answer time. This is the most modern church I’ve ever seen.

Any way to my main story. Back in like grade 6 there was a beautiful girl name Maryanne. We called her psycho bitch because she used to beat us up, put caterpillars down our shirt and squish them. Every time we would see her, we would run away because of all her roughhousing. This was crazy because we (the boys) would roughhouse as well. I mean back then we would light things on fire and cause all kinds of mischief, but we couldn’t handle being beaten up by a beautiful girl.

I became a Christian at age 17, and I lost contact with Maryanne a few years prior, although I would hear about her once in a while because she dated some of my close friends.

When I was in college and doing an internship around age 19, I met her again at Tim Hortons. She was a cashier and just had a round of chemotherapy. She had cancer and had lost all her hair from the treatment. She was smiling at me while holding back tears. “I’ll never have children” she said. Without thinking (story of my life) I told her that Jesus would heal her, and tried to tell her as much as I could about my new found faith before I had to go (there were other customers in the line). I gave her my contact information.

I make promises to people all the time. Most of the time I come through, sometimes I don’t. When I tell people about Jesus though, I really boast. I boast big. And I had boasted big about Jesus to Maryanne in front of other people. When I got home I almost started to panic, because I realized I promised this girl that Jesus would come through for her and that one day she would have kids.

Fast forward to right now, several years later. I had just picked up a Medium pizza with Nathan and when we were walking outside of the mall in front of Price Chopper, I hear a scream “asif, asif!”. Maryanne ran up to me and before I had a chance to react, she jumped on me, arms and legs wrapped around me completely. I was surprised my spine didn’t collapse. All the weight lifting has been working out. Her hair is long and beautiful, in fact she’s more beautiful than I remember.

She went on to Nathan about how great of a man I am. (She and Nathan had never met prior). She really went on. And of course I’m not, but God is so great He came through for both me and Maryanne. I wish everyone who was in the Tim Hortons years prior could see. Both of us grew up in tough environments. Both of us came up from the wrong side of the tracks. Both of us have been healed by Jesus.

And yes, she now has a beautiful biological son. I write these journals so that I can one day read them again. But this story doesn’t require a journal entry. I’ll remember it for eternity.

Cocaine and cocaine related problems

If you live in Malton, you will at some point be exposed to drugs. Probably weed by grade 6, and harder drugs by high school. Girls will get introduced to drugs earlier, because boys use drugs to get sex from girls in high school. Girls do drugs to impress boys, it’s a vicious cycle, plus add in the fact that there aren’t as many fathers and mothers as their should be and everything is crazy in this country. I mean we live in a great country but we are allowed to kill innocent babies but we aren’t allowed to kill baby rapists? Is there any wonder so many people do drugs?

Anyway, when I was around age 14 my friend Steve and I walked up and down Airport road, applying at every single place for a job. We were well dressed and walked for hours, pretty much an entire day down one side of the road and up another side. Airport Road becomes Dixon Road after a while, we walked further than that!

We applied at offices, gyms, even Hooters. We applied to several Mcdonalds. Steve used to make home made popsicles and sell them in his townhouse complex and I had my small businesses running as well, plus an idea for a game called goodmitten, it would be a better version of badmitton. We just really needed steady employment because of our life responsibilities.

It was rather obvious that nobody was going to hire us because we were young, and although I had a small business at the time it wasn’t bringing in enough money to support my needs and family.

Steve then got an offer to deal acid / LSD on Goreway Drive near Brandongate and he asked if I wanted in. We talked about it for about an hour. The money was a big draw, you could make several hundred everyday just in a small area, the territory would be protected for us so we wouldn’t fear gang wars. We decided to sleep on it, and the next day concluded that neither of us would do it, we would just try to be successful in business and try even harder to get jobs. We must have applied at almost every Mcdonalds in Mississauga and Brampton, possibly some in Etobicoke as well.

What kind of drug dealer would I be? I’d give away the drugs for free, and to those who couldn’t pay. And if I made a profit it would go into missions work. LOL. I’d be the kindest, gentlest drug dealer in Canada – and probably the quickest to die and the most made fun of.

You see drug deals take place here, especially at the schools. People aren’t generally shy about it, and a lot of people are armed. Systems are in place to prevent getting caught. If you want to buy a small amount of drugs, you go to a local high school, you can get any drug in a high school. I’m surprised there aren’t more video cameras and police officers in high school.

I’ve actually witnessed a massive multi million $ drug bust but I can’t talk about it here, plus the details are fuzzy anyway.

Anyway fast forward to today, Nathan and I were in my old Neon, the car was in park, but on, and a drunk man in a van, who was driving too fast anyway, hit the backside of my car going in the opposite direction. He got out of his van, stinking of booze and started yelling at us that us youngsters do too much “crack cocaine”. I assured him that I have never had involvement with the stuff and felt good of my clear conscience.

I love New York and America!

I’ve been to New York many times. Some of my favorite memories include the Jamaica Avenue street vendors who will sell you anything, for almost any price. In the early 90’s I purchased a cassette tape of MC Hammer for $2 USD. Here’s how that went down.

Asif: do you have MC Hammer?
Vendor: Yes, wait here.
Vendor then immediately abandons his cart of cassette tapes with me, age 10-11 approx and runs down the crowded street. He was gone for a good couple of minutes and came back with the tape. Dude should have charged me $25 for all the work he did.

These days I go to New York for business and I don’t find anything to be cheap anymore. I had to sign a contract and get it to its destination and my pen ran out of ink, so I stopped into a stationary store to get the cheapest pen I could find – $20 for 1 pen!

After the September 11 attacks in New York, getting into the USA has been a little harder for me. I went to New York recently and they stopped us at the border, had bomb sniffing dogs sniff through my car, and had me remove all the items from the car. I was questioned about why I had so many bibles (because I give them away to people who give their life to Jesus) and why I had so much cash on me ($500 USD). They were obviously looking for a reason. People like that are dumb. The worst part actually, I mean the most uncomfortable part of this was that 99.9% of the people stopped at the border were colored people. Look I completely understand the need for this and to be extra safe, but come on.

The ultra rudeness of the lady behind the counter was almost unbearable. She was nasty on a level that I couldn’t understand, she was speaking to me as if I was her personal enemy. She didn’t ask me where I was going, where I was staying, what business I would be conducting, she asked questions that I had no answer for. She asks “what’s your fathers name Asif?” And of course I have no clue what his name is, I never met the guy – so I tell her this and this made her very angry. She screamed at me in front of everyone about how suspicious it was that I didn’t know my fathers name, and so loudly that a supervising officer probably felt bad for me and he simply shut her up and let me into the USA with an apologetic face. After that I’ve been going without any issue.

Mission 3:16

My rant: When it comes to business I’m old fashioned. Develop a good product or service, and sell sell sell. I don’t like these magic vitamin companies or multi level marketing schemes or businesses that simply make money by recruiting people and have no real product or service. I can’t believe that smart people join up with these things, and I can’t believe they think I’m so stupid that I’ll join up with them. No, I don’t want to sell your magic vitamins. No, I don’t want to recruit for your multi level marketing business. No, I don’t want to pay $500 to sign up for your business venture. LOL. People fail and they want to drag others down with them.

I spent the day with some friends at a gigantic antique shop, which was out in the middle of nowhere. I mean it. There was a large mall sized antique / flea market style shop with over 100 vendors, and beside it a small bakery, and then nothing else for miles. I know this because I purchased a treat from the bakery, then walked a far way in both directions hoping to find something else. So I really had no choice but to spend the day antiquing, since…well they drove me here. There was some really neat stuff though. I was looking for an antique umbrella but couldn’t find one and I bought some nic nacs that I’ll give away the first chance I get.

Last year June – December I didn’t get to do as much missions work as I wanted and that wore heavy on my heart. Don’t get me wrong I always do as much as I can, but this year so far has been the opposite, I’ve clearly made up for all the missions opportunities I missed out on last year.

So far:
I sent a soon to be police officer on a life changing mission trip to South America
Helped a small orphanage do some much needed repairs
Participated in the digging of several fresh water wells
Helped a new church

My friends and I live in Malton, and a lot of people here have guns or easy access to guns. Unfortunately this includes teens. Well one day we went to play baseball after work and noticed a bunch of young black teens hanging around watching us, so I invited them to play with us, which they gladly did.

I can understand people carrying around handguns, but some teens carry around sawed off shotguns, and I met one young man who had a grenade. I didn’t bother asking if it was real, because I learned that curiosity killed the cat. Interestingly enough it’s not just males that are armed, females as well! Anyway you know me, each person got an invitation to church – and I’ve witnessed weapons surrendered to local authorities because of a new life surrendered to Christ. Although I can’t share details on everything, (partially because I can’t remember all the details anymore) just last year I participated in a youth event that saw more than 30 firearms handed over to the police.

I hate summer

If you’re reading this and you know me, then you know that I’m a workaholic. I’ve been battling this for years. As soon as the sun rises, I like to be up and working. As soon as the sun sets, I finish up for the day. In the summer the days are long, and so I work as long as it’s bright outside. This leads to burnout, and so I’ve begun to hate summer. I’ve actually ruined relationships simply because I’ve been too busy to care about anything else. When I was younger this problem was worst, I would actually skip occasional nights of sleep – I mean entire nights, just so I could work more and get ahead. I don’t have that kind of energy anymore so I do sleep a full night for the most part.

Over the last few years I’ve gotten really involved in digging fresh water wells in third world countries and the costs are so variable. In one place a well can cost $2,500 because you don’t have to dig very deep, in other places $300,000 or more depending on the engineering and machinery involved. I used to have a goal of like 10,000 fresh water wells but when I realized how impossible that number was I lowered it to like 1,000 and I think I’ll just lower this to like 100 or less because it’s such an uphill struggle. If it was the only thing in my life I could put more energy into it, but as I’m typing this, I’m also holding a baby and tonight we are going to help someone move.

I really hate summer.