I Guess I Can Only Go Up From Here

I have more than 25 collection agencies on my back. I drank one too many whiskeys last night and I barfed. That was a very first. I also used several curse words out loud, which is highly unusual for me. I’m not proud of myself that’s for sure. Talk about hitting new lows! A young crackhead offered me sex for $5 – I asked her to please stop banging on my door. She looks like she has scurvy. I feel like I have scurvy.

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