the roof is on fire

A good teacher is priceless. And I do believe that it takes a community to raise a child, especially these days where there aren’t many good parents left in Canada. In middle school I would visit my primary school teachers. In high school my friend Corey and I would visit our middle school teachers. In college I would visit my high school teachers. I’m still friends with some of them, and a lot of them are in the retirement stage. I fear for them though, because even though most of them are in a stage of retirement, the ones who are left might be fired for what is being called politically incorrect or intolerance. Back in my days teachers were in charge of the kids and allowed to teach and say whatever they wanted to say if it would raise up good men and women. For example our gym teacher Mr. K taught us about being responsible, my English teacher Mrs. Bell taught us to wait till we are married to have sex. Today she might be forced to hand out condoms. Today the kids are in charge and the teachers can only say what is politically correct, even if it’s wrong. And because of this I fear that many of Canada’s children will grow up to be wimps. I think the bully problem will get worst and based on what I see on the net, things are getting worst in society.

Anyway about 10 years ago Corey and I visited Mr. Morris and incredibly, not only did he still remember me but he still had an unfinished project of mine tucked away near his desk. He pulled it out from his files and asked me to finish it. I told him no lol but I was amazed that he had my unfinished homework.

He taught me several life lessons I still use to this day:

– Sometimes rules need to be broken. Middle school had a serious rule that only 1 person per class was allowed to go to the bathroom at a time. One day one of our classmates was moving away to Kingston Ontario and was crying, Mr. Morris let her go to the bathroom with a girlfriend. He said no at first, then said yes when he saw her crying.

– Get a different perspective on problems when you are stumped. He would do this thing where he would write a complicated problem on the chalk board and pretend he was solving it with us. He would pretend he didn’t know the answer, get up from his desk and go stand in a bizarre corner of the classroom. He’s say something like “I need to see this problem from a different angle.” I still do this to this day.

Now here’s one of the real reasons I really liked him: At that time in life, grade 8, I didn’t know anything about computers, I used to make fun of people who had them, “oh hi I’m Asif, I’m a genius, I have a computer, I can help you with your taxes.” is what I used to say to people who had computers. Many of my classmates had them though. Mr. Morris would ask me to fix computers and it got me out of class. I don’t know if he thought I knew about computers, because I didn’t, I rarely ever touched them at the time. It could have been some kind of lesson he was trying to teach me. But I would learn all about it because the more computers I could fix for the school, the more class time I could avoid. I ended up fixing just about every computer at that school, while getting full class credit.

He is on my list of favorite teachers. Of course today he can’t pull those kinds of stunts. Kids like me would be heavily medicated and given false disabilities. He would simply be fired for giving too much homework or for pushing kids too hard. Teachers are no longer in charge, it’s nut job parents and kids who are in charge, and if their children don’t want to do their homework, the parents just complain till the teacher gets fired. Get their children falsely diagnosed with some fake disability and over-medicated. I see parents all the time who complain that their child has ADHD, when really they are just bad parents and their child is spoiled rotten. Okay, obviously some of the kids have real disabilities, but every reasonable adult knows that most people fake it. Go ahead, ask your doctor.

The last day of Lancaster middle school was filled with action, one of the local dope smokers lit the school on fire, apparently starting with the massive stage curtains in the gym. Turns out that now many years later the school will undergo a massive renovation.

A few years later in high school when I was walking up Airport Road back to Malton, this same kid caught up with me for a chat. He lived in one of the newer, nicer houses and had a lot of toys. People told me he was basically a spoiled brat who was always on playtime. He ruined that last day of school for us, my backpack had some of my prized possessions inside at a time in life when I didn’t have very much at all. It was lost due to the fire.

Fast forward to when I was in high school, he was coming home from his probation meeting or something like that and I was coming home from job hunting. I considered pushing him off the sidewalk into traffic but during the long walk with him I thought it through. Too many witnesses first of all, but more than that, I felt sorry for him. He was a real loser. Today I hope and pray that he’s doing better.

Today I woke up, had some tea, read the bible, worshiped, spent time in prayer, then I worked to around 530pm, then did some errands. For dinner I had a salad and a cheeseburger from Mcdonalds. As a treat I have cotton candy. Now I’m typing up this journal and hopefully I’ll watch some tv tonight, go out for a prayer walk and be ready for bed around 11. Almost every day I’ve been doing a lot of biking riding all over the trans Canada trail and Malton with Mason and Eggbert. Sometimes we invite others along and it’s really fun. One time we went to Woodbine Centre after to get Chinese food and another time we went to Popeye’s at Albion Road to get biscuits. I like getting discount clothing from Albion Mall. They have track suits there for $8.

I have this box of precious memories, I call it my treasure chest. My grandma would usually throw out every good thing I had, so it was a struggle to keep certain things hidden within the furniture of my bedroom. I’ve amassed a small box with hundreds of little important trinkets that I like to look at. I’ve been keeping them in a secure location the last few years, I have them with me again. This month I’ve been looking through it, organizing it as best I can. There’s my stamp collection, stock certificate collection, old currency collection, fathers day cards to me. Photos, old video tape, there’s notes written to me by children that say “I love you Asif” or “Asif I wish you were my dad”, drawings, old letters, report cards that say “Asif can do better.” If those teachers would have spent a few nights at my house they would have given me straight A’s.

My neighbor across the hall does Tae Kwon Do. She seems to get locked out of her apartment often. On May 13 I invented a really good lemon chicken recipe. I own 2 pairs of shoes and I’m happy with that.

On May 29, Mason and I did our longest bike riding adventure so far. 7 hours in total, we rode from Malton to Harbor front in Toronto. We used the Trans Canada trail, riding through forests and so on, so it wasn’t a direct route. We didn’t ride for speed, but for enjoyment. When we got to harbor front we took a break, ate a hot dog from a street vendor, and then started the ride back. I saw chipmunks up close for the first time, and there was a shot my camera couldn’t get – we were riding through a forest, on a dirt path, something like you’d see in a movie. The sunlight pierced through the trees and it looked like beams of light shining through. We got back after dark. Talk about work out. Talk about fun.

The mission takes priority

When I was in high school I was not in the in crowd. I was mostly a loner with too much responsibility to notice what was going on around me. I was also in the video club, and the nerd club which was fine with me. One day I got an invite to a cool people party. I can’t remember what cool thing I did to get this invite, I think it had something to do with beating up a dirt bag that was mistreating a girl. If you know me you know that I don’t go to parties. Never have, never will. I did stop by this one to see what it was like because a girl asked me to take her there safely. It’s just like what you see in the movies with the booze and the making out and silly behavior. Super hot high school girls ruining their lives one boy at a time. Fast forward though to today and the people I knew from that party are mostly doing nothing with their lives. I do stop and chats with some of them at the mall and it’s just sad. Today I met one of them in a convenience store at the Westwood Mall and asked him what he’s been up and he said “staying high”.

Several times in my life, I have learned that the in crowd is the sin crowd. They are the crowd that most people strive to attain membership in, but the worst crowd to be a part of. Everything looks good on the outside. Smiles, friendship, even fun and love. But it’s not real. It doesn’t last. It breaks down. It’s not worth it. Plenty of backstabbing, plenty of gossip. Everyone wants everyone else to fail.

I’m trying out this new thing called digital cable. Basically you have a box you attach to your tv and you get more channels, plus movies on demand and special content. After enjoying it for a few days I was reminded that America has had similar technology for a while, maybe not digital though, in fact I rented a movie on demand back in the late 80’s or early 90’s in New York City. To my recollection it was either something with Hulk Hogan or Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Why is Canada behind on these things? And why do companies market their technology as new when it’s been in existence and use for a long time? I don’t mean this about the digital cable but everything.

I watched my friend C give his life to Jesus in the late 90’s. I think 1998 or 1999. At the time he was about 6ft tall and maybe 275+ lbs. (dude if you’re reading this and I’m wrong about your weight, I’m so sorry) I was sitting way at the back and he walked from the very back all the way down the isle during an emotional church service, and fell down on the ground at the alter. He was crying hard. When others saw this they started crying. K brought him to church, I think that was his first time. Later we would be camping in Bancroft and we shared a tent. While I was trying to sleep, my other friend L came into the tent, and her and C chatted the night away. It wouldn’t be much long after that for them to get married, and I stood near him at his wedding as a groomsmen / usher. Fast forward to now, on April 4th I visited that old church again and took photos with C and L and their new baby boy. I held him while they took photos of me to. It was nice visiting with good friends that I haven’t seen for a long time. We all took photos and it was like I was always there this whole time. When God calls you away to do other things, it’s both exciting and terrible. But all in all everything will come full circle, in heaven we’ll all be back together again. The mission takes priority.

When I share the gospel with people, it’s just random people. Sometimes it leads to nothing because a person isn’t interested. Other times it leads to a person converting and living for Jesus, other times it leads to death threats including fists, knives and guns. From drug dealers who lost paying customers to bad husbands who’ve lost their punching bag, not everyone is happy to see people convert and be set free.

I remind myself, the mission takes priority. The mission takes priority.

Night time prayer time is my favorite prayer time

My morning time prayers are important and a foundation for my life. But sometimes they can be rushed, especially depending on my schedule. My night time prayers are usually my favorite. I spend a good hour at least and I’m not rushed or stressed because it’s the end of the day. I find that the better I pray, the better I sleep and the better I wake up. The better I live.

I realized that in recent years that I’ve been talking about regaining my fitness, and now realize that I’ve been trying to regain my youth. Specifically my youthful energy and vitality. I’m aging, and I confused it with being out of shape. It’s true that I’m out of shape but that’s not the real issue. I have wrinkles, droopy elbow skin, and thinning gray hair. There’s no going back from this, I’ll just learn to enjoy it. At the gym this dude said “Asif give me some tips, how did you get that chest?”. Somehow I dumbbell pressed my way to a ripped and larger than average chest muscles which I’ll enjoy while I can because they say that it’ll start to get saggy after a while and turn into man boobs.

My neighbor, a man, got ultra massive pec implants. I don’t know how he found a doctor to put in such big implants. And I get it, hitting the gym every day is hard and doesn’t always take us to our goals. But he’s got a normal thin / athletic frame and a terminator chest. He walks around town shirtless. Everyone just gawks because it looks so incredibly unrealistic, like a special effect.

At the rate I’m going, I won’t finish my bachelors degree for years, lol, but at least I’m doing it debt free. My friends make fun of me but at least I’m doing it, and I’m paying as I go so I won’t have student loans. I was advised today that since I don’t have a high school diploma, (I dropped out around age 15 or 16) I’ll have go take a GED exam so I can then be granted my degree. Doh!

The last time I was in high school, the teachers were giving me money because my team was replacing their old computers for really really good new ones. I was wearing sneakers, bluejeans and a suit jacket with the label still on the cuff. A science teacher told me that had to be cut off. My English teacher, concerned about me dropping out asked me if I was earning at least $100,000 / year, which I was not. I did have a job offer on the table for $60,000 and it wouldn’t be long after and I would be offered a job of $80,000. It would be a good long while before I would see $100,000 / year. But I was happy.

Giving is living

Most of the missions / giving / church / ministry projects I do turn out very well. I aim for 1 major mission project a year and several small projects each year. If I’m feeling rather rich, I’ll do more, if I’m actually financially poor, I have to cut back and do less, but I always do something – even if it means cutting back, for instance not having a car for a year, cutting the cable, etc.

Some of the major projects can include digging a fresh water well for a village in a 3rd world country or sponsoring a 12 month mission trip. A smaller project would be sponsoring a missionary to go on a 1-2 week trip, making sure they have enough money and supplies to reach as many with the gospel as possible. One of my favorite missions project included this one where a team of missionaries would go into remote villages in India and setup a makeshift portable movie theatre and play a movie called the Jesus Film. It’s a film about the life of the Lord and the purpose is so that many people will give their life to Him. This isn’t as simple as it sounds.

My friend Wiebke went on this one where a cruise ship was converted into a ‘mission ship’. It traveled around parts of the world for 2 years (talk about a long mission trip), and they would play the Jesus film on the side of the massive sea vessel and evangelize in areas that are hard to reach by land alone. She told me about her many adventures. We try to trade stories and hers are usually better than mine. She’s been a missionary since she was born, her family has traveled all over the planet, starting churches everywhere.

Regarding the Jesus Film missions project, aside from the ship, most teams have to carry portable equipment, including a power generator, by bike because there aren’t roads everywhere in the world. They go into remote tribal areas that haven’t been reached before, and the film is voiced over in most languages. People sit on the ground and the picture quality isn’t really good. There are dangers of being kidnapped, raped and killed. We do a small get together when people come back here safely and hear their stories about being spat on, stoned, beaten up, shot at, and sometimes worst. We consider a project successful when people give their life to Jesus and there are positive changes in the community. I get to hear this kind of good news regularly and then I share the good news with my friends. Interesting fact; wherever Christianity spreads, crime goes way down, economic problems go down, suicide, murder, rape, all goes down. Education, health, well being, quality of life all goes up. This can’t be said about other religions or atheism.

On the other hand, sometimes missions projects just don’t work. People take advantage and do their own thing, money goes missing, people misrepresent what they want to do. It doesn’t happen often, these failures are a SMALL percentage but when it happens it hurts everyone and can be discouraging if a lot of hard earned money and TIME was lost. When you are expecting lives to be changed and found out that instead of that – dope was smoked or a new wardrobe purchased or house was renovated, well it makes me furious and discourages everyone. Recently I wasted some valuable time and money on this exact thing, what can I do but say oops and move on?

Old things can lead to new things, new things can lead to old things

In Guyana, I slept on a real bed with my grandmother. Her house cost her $500 USD cash back in the 50’s and is still standing strong today. Maybe some Canadian construction companies can learn a thing or two? When we moved to Canada, I slept on the floor for the first few years. I had a sponge to sleep on and it was perfectly fine. When I turned 7 years old I got my first bed. I gave that bed away a while back, and I’m now sleeping on the floor again which is very enjoyable for me.

My friends call me a minimalist. I like to give away my things and have the least amount of possessions as humanly possible. I don’t even like having multiple pens.

I’m at the gym 5 days a week even in the winter. I walked through like a foot of snow and ice cold wind to get to the gym, which has been moved to the other side of town while renovations are happening at the main location. One of the long time trainers was there and I asked her for some advise, she complimented my little muscles. Yes, I will be extending my membership!

I helped Mason with his job hunting, writing his resume and handing it out with him in many places. He got a job at Woodbine Centre, specifically he helps a woman’s lingerie / underwear department. He’s as happy as can be and all I hear from him is about how great his job is. He text messages me to tell me about how happy he is to be walking to his job (he even goes early), he texts me during breaks to tell me about his adventures, he even stays late after work. He goes on and on about the beautiful women he helps all day and night. I’ve never heard anyone speak so happily about their job. I haven’t achieved this yet. Most people haven’t. Most people aren’t super excited to go to work, most don’t stay late on purpose.

I visited him there, well, I went there to spy on him, and the dude was helping women choose lingerie with a huge smile on his face. I watched him smile for like a good 10 minutes straight. I was laughing because I thought it was hilarious, and I was at awe at how this young man had reached such a great level of happiness so fast. I’ve known him about 7 years and never seen him smile so much. Most of us will never reach that level of happiness at a job, or at anything, ever.

So the consulting project I’m working on right now will provide me with an income for 2 years. Not a big income, but enough to pay my rent, car, gas, phone, insurance, etc and several decent sized missions projects. I’m also going to try to do a big project along side this one and see if I can get a small bank to like my idea. Problem is it won’t actually pay me for like 4 more months which is making things really tight around here. Another risk is that I won’t get paid at all, this has happened several times and leads to great discouragement. Nobodies fault, that’s just the way it is. I’ve consulted for companies that have gone under part way though, and I didn’t find out till I visited the office to see the eviction notice on the door. Other times I’ll find out that the company I’m working with / for has been purchased by another company and all the previous management fired or replaced – and they have no idea who I am. And yes once in while things will work out better than expected and I’ll do better than expected and get paid more than expected.

I’m still in the beginning stages of this project which involves making a lot of phone calls, I’m on the phone almost all day doing my research, which is annoying but still better than traveling. My little suitcase is gathering dust, I like that. Maybe one day soon I can give it away to.

Most of my friends have internet access now. So we all chat online after work. It’s so different. No waiting weeks or even months for letters to arrive in the mail from my missionary friends, or phone calls at hours with static connections. They are basically in countries all over the world which makes communication difficult. Pretty much all of them have some form of internet access now. Time zones aren’t even such a bother anymore. One of my friends doing missions in the Ukraine got spat on, simply because she was there and the person didn’t like Christians. I’m currently trying to gain steam on an Orphanage in the Ukraine, at the rate I’m going this project will be done, realistically by the year 2015. I started it in 2001. It breaks my heart but it’s the best I can do. I hate that so much but it’s out of my hands. Some projects move fast, some move slow.

If Frodo can do it then so can we

Yeah I watched part 3. I got the books for Christmas as well but I can’t read the books after I watch the movie. Spoiler alert: Frodo did it. He completed his quest and lived happily ever after. Find out from God what your quest is, then spend your life on it. Heaven is your happily ever after.

The past couple of years for me has been almost non stop adventure and bizarre circumstances, one after another. 2003 was an awesome roller coaster, I spend today looking at my journals for the year. There aren’t very many because I’ve been so busy doing so much. Moving into 2004, I’m hoping for like, no adventure. Just a nice boring existence. Winter has set in nice and good and I’m enjoying it.

In Canada, there is talk about legalizing drugs. I don’t care if we do, as long as whoever does drugs doesn’t expect society to pay for their mistakes. I talked to my doctor about doing anabolic steroids just to try them out, and after getting his good advise, I tried some.
This was last year – I did a very short, 2 week cycle of testosterone precursors called androstenedione or something like that. Why did I do it? Call it youthful curiosity. I wanted to see what would happen. Maybe I just wanted a boost.

When I was a teen I setup a makeshift gym and fight club in my garage, people from the neighborhood would come to fight or lift weights. We didn’t have any good equipment, a home made squat rack, a portion of a skid for calf raises. Different sizes of plastic weights. I filled a large US Army issued carryall bag part way with sand and we used that as a punching bag, when we weren’t using each other for punching bags. People would come over asking for me and my grandmother would use her fists to do a boxing motion and would say “asif is boxing, he’s boxing”.

The dealer I bought the stuff from was the size of a bear and he said the stuff works – and boy did it. Strength and endurance went up through the roof almost right away. I think I did over 100 full pushups and 25 full pullups and went about my day like it was nothing. I can’t believe this stuff is completely legal in America. I bet that lots of young people will start to do steroids. At the 2 week point I started to feel like it would turn me into a flesh eating zombie so I threw out the rest of the supply and lost most of my gains. My doctor (who I spoke to through this whole process), laughed and laughed. He told me that when I’m much older, in my 50’s that I should ask him again, and maybe we can do it properly and in a way that actually benefits me permanently.

Which brings me to my Merry Christmas and Happy new Year message: Sometimes it’s a good idea to abandon your direction. Sometimes the plan sounds smart but will lead to stupid results. Sometimes the outcome isn’t worth the consequences. Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is to stop, and walk away. To give up doesn’t mean to lose. Sometimes the biggest losers are the ones who don’t know when to give up.

I like winter

I like winter, and Canada has a lot of winter. I would have no problem with moving way up north where there’s always snow and the days are short. November has been a month of settling down for me. No major dramas, no major situations. I wake up, drink tea, eat breakfast, spend time in my bible, then worship, then prayer. My real prayer time is at night though, after I finish my entire day. Work a good amount, mostly from home. No more travel. I’m sick and tired of it. I do a few hours of studying and then errands, and I like to watch tv. 7th Heaven is my favorite and I could only hope to be a great pastor like Pastor Camden from the show.

I purchased a fountain that looks like a beautiful vase with water flowing out of the top, down the side. I have it in the corner of the living room. I slept in the living room and I guess while I was sleeping my hand touched the fountain, and the water ran down my arm, past my head, down my back. I woke up soaked and the fountain was empty of water. At first I thought I wet myself. Because of my life, I would have completely understood if I did wet myself.

Thanksgiving

I don’t have much to write. I’ve hit a sort of dry patch. The money from the consulting work I started in Jan dried out last month, and I have another project starting but it won’t yield a paycheck for like 6 months or more. One thing about consulting is that you don’t always get a regular paycheck. One dream of every business person is either 1.) a massive one time payout or 2.) a healthy recurring monthly income. I haven’t achieved any of those yet but I’ll keep trying.

In 2001 I hit a rough financial patch – part of it my own stupidity, part was helping too many people and part was the misdoings of a rotten investment bank that is currently facing a class action lawsuit from hundreds of Canadian investors. I was walking down Etude Drive and praying for “just $10” and a $10 bill fell out of the sky right in front of me.

Well a couple days ago I was remembering that during my prayer time, walking up Darcel Avenue I was praying “I should have asked for $20″ and right then a crisp $20 bill fell out of the sky, and landed directly onto my foot.

Mom has been yelling at me because over the past 5 or 6 years I’ve been giving away too much money, sacrificing my own stability. Other family and friends have become concerned about this also. I argued with her but actually she’s right. I won’t tell her she’s right, but she’s right. They’re all right. They did a surprise intervention about this and it was very uncomfortable for me.

I’ve been going to the gym several times a week and eating fairly healthy. My stomach is down to like 38”.

I really don’t have much to write. I had a nice thanksgiving at my place with 6 people, was so much fun. My desk of the past 6 years is actually a large dining table, this was the first time I used it for dining, and what better way than with friends. haha.

I don’t have much to write.

I’m so old, dinosaurs used to do research on me

I’m getting older. Hopefully wiser. Definitely fatter. I’m losing more hairs each day, and gaining wrinkles. My elbow has saggy skin. Hair is growing out of my ears and nose. Life is moving fast. And I’ve made a resolution that it needs to slow down a bit. Just a bit. Just enough so I can breath. Just enough so I’m not eating breakfast and answering emails at the same time. So I don’t have to eat dinner while driving.

The days are getting shorter now that summer is over. The year so far has been complex. 2003 has been a hard to explain year.

With so much going on I can’t summarize or even explain in detail everything. A friend asked me ‘what’s up’ and when I told her, I realized I spoke for 60 minutes straight without stopping. Her response was “wow”.

I like hearing crickets chirping. It makes me think the work day is over. The kids want to play but I just want to lay on the floor and nap. I can’t though, because they all pile on top of me, laughing and laughing. One time they all sat on me while I was laying on the floor, and gabby (the fattest cat in Canada) sat on my face. I wish I had a pic of this.

I’ve been taking a lot of photographs lately. I invested in a camera store a few years back and I’m increasing my ownership. The owners are a bit goofy for my taste but I’m learning that this is what the industry is like. Digital cameras are the future. No more processing film. (Okay I still use a film camera to, but only because I have it.) The quality with digital isn’t as good just yet, but it will be one day. Anyway, I have like 2 baby photos, my parents have none, grandparents have none. My childhood photo album is small. We couldn’t afford all that and in Guyana we didn’t have running water, let alone a camera. In school they would take photos and send us home with whole pack of them, and you would have a choice of paying for them or returning them. I always ended up returning them. We simply couldn’t afford it. I’d like to revisit some of these memories one day and photos are good way.

I got my phone bill this month and it was like $600. Also I learned about calling cards – and I felt really stupid that I didn’t already know about them. I ate a double licks burger and still had room for desert after. I went bike riding almost everyday after work. I got new glasses. And contacts lenses.

It’s time for a new chapter.

Family Reunion

Lets start off with me venting then conclude with something good.

Have you ever tried to do something good, and have it blow up in your face? This happens to me often, and I never seem to learn, and chances are I haven’t learned this time either. I helped someone get an apartment by paying first and last, 6 months of rent, signing my name for the apartment and helping them to move in.

The moving in was fun, because something good was being done for someone with a baby. I’ve done this many times before, and I will do this many times again. The apartment was nice, it did need an initial cleaning as most do, and in a crawl space were many empty beer bottles. Eggbert, and I packed what seemed to be 500 empty beer bottles into my car. We saw some grouchy church people pass us by holding all the beer bottles, shaking their heads. Later I would learn that a rumor was started that Eggbert and I were having a fling and that we were both drunkards.

Now for those of you who have never done this you’re thinking “ah, he shouldn’t have put up the money.” No. It’s the putting up my name where I shouldn’t have. This person over the course of 6 months has turned the apartment into a pile of poo-poo, like literally. I’ll explain more after. It started with the landlord calling me at all hours complaining that the tenant was not home, and the 2 year old baby was alone, crying. I couldn’t believe this to be true so I would go over to get some answers. I would get further calls of noise and dirty smells coming from the (basement) apartment, I would go over and get some answers. This got worst and worst until I got a call that the tenant had left, and that I should come over to see the apartment.

I went over, with 4 other friends, the same that helped move her in just a few months prior. Well, what we saw is something we are still talking about, something we’ll be talking about for a long time to come. A 800sq ft apartment turned into a garbage dump. Dirty baby diapers piled up into the bathtub (HOW DID YOU SHOWER?) and garbage everywhere. I mean, everywhere. I mean really everywhere. We brought 10 large garbage bags with us, and I had to go to the store to buy 40 more. Yes 40 more garbage bags.

There were some items we thought to be in good condition; particularly clothing and baby items and so we took those over to the goodwill donation truck at the Westwood Mall. The intake manager was delighted to get so much stuff all at once. It was such a stressful night that after I took everyone to Mandarin so I could drown my sorrows in shrimp and honey garlic ribs. A few days later we would read in the paper about a Mississauga goodwill donation that had to be burned because it caused the staff to get sick. We jokingly laugh, with a touch of fear that it could have been the donation we made.

The worst part of this story? The landlord told me she trusted me when she took in this tenant, and now she doesn’t trust me. I do this thing all the time. This year so far I’ve paid for 3 peoples first and lasts, 2 turned out very well and this one blew up in my face.

And now to some good stuff as promised. My friends invited me to go to their family reunion. I jumped at the opportunity because I’ve never been to a family reunion. I’ve seen them on tv in movies, but my family doesn’t do that kind of thing. This started off with a drive out to the country. A farm, maybe 10 acres or more. When we drove up I thought “wow look at this massive property.” Turned out that was simply the front yard. The backyard was 10x bigger and had several crops growing including corn which we would later pick, roast and eat.

We arrived rather early, and just helped with the cooking and the setup. One of my favorite things to do is walk around, so I walked around. I walked up and down that country road, enjoying the absolute nothing that was out there. Back at the property people were starting to arrive, young and old. The children wanted to play so we did some Frisbee games. I sat on a tractor. I had conversations.

Now it was the conversations that made this family reunion so much fun for me. So many different generations of family, from babies, to grandparents and I think there was a great grand parent as well.

God does the same thing for us. He invites everyone into His gigantic family which consists of all kinds of people of all ages and all backgrounds. Strangers are welcomed in and treated as family. And there’s lots of food :)

We spent the time talking and talking more, taking photographs, laughing, telling jokes. Someone told me they were going to propose to someone else, and then that someone else asked me what that someone said, but I won’t tell. I will be at the wedding though :)

Keeping my head above water

Okay so Peterborough last month was fun, so what happens when you do something fun? YOU DO IT AGAIN!

The trip started very early in the morning so we could get to Peterborough and do some major ditch digging. A friends house was being flooded constantly, and so several us would spend the better part of a day digging a ditch along one side of the property to run a proper drainage system so the water would run away from the house. The hardest part of this was hitting tree roots.

During breaks we did fun things – I played with the fattest and cutest dog in the world named Waketa, and I let Eggbert (age 13 or 14) steer my car while I push it down the street (the car was powered off and in neutral). I figured when I was her age I was already driving on the highway, she should at least get to sort of drive.

Waketa was in the back of the car and having a blast. I don’t know what kind of dog she was, a collie I think? Similar to Lassie. Except Waketa is super duper fat. She brought me a bottle of water while I was digging. Now that’s a good dog! Wouldn’t it be nice if all dogs were this great? Instead of just barking early in the morning or pooing all over the place.

After ditch digging was done, it was time to head on over to this other house for fun time. This house backed onto a lake, which as you know is one of my favorite things. We all swam and did a BBQ. The neighborhood children (2x 10 year old girls) came over to swim as well, and they both took a liking to me right away. I think it’s mostly because I’m super fun, and partially because I’m brown which is a huge novelty here. They were definitely country girls who’s lives consisted of swimming in the lake and the like. It was such a fun day and I wish I could do this kind of stuff everyday, even if I had to start it out with hard labor in the hot sun.

Actually I learned to swim today. When I was 6 years old someone held my head under water in the bathtub for a while, and my nose was already busted and bleeding badly so it sure helped me gain a fear of the water – so I haven’t taken the opportunity to learn how to swim. I mean in grade school our class would to go over to Westwood Secondary School to use their pool, but that was more of me and my friends spying on girls and getting out of class. Swimming in a lake is much different from being in a pool, the water feels endlessly deep and you feel like you’re a part of it. I can swim for like 50 feet with no problem, and it’s interesting how I just walked into the water slowly, and started swimming, as if I had been doing it my whole life.

Picture this: I was actually swimming with 2 young girls latched onto me, they were giggling and it was good exercise for me, even though I was already exhausted from ditch digging all day. Neighbors passed by on their boats waving to me, and I was invited by another neighbor to come over for a beer. The sun was starting to set, it was still nice and warm, the water was warm and I could smell bbq.

When we had to leave I simply didn’t want to, and neither did the 2 girls, who asked when I’d be coming back and wouldn’t let go of me. I wish I could do this more often, I wish this was my life!

Jesus Heals

I took a trip to Peterborough Ontario, I haven’t been here since like 1999 or 2000 and the last time I was here, I didn’t get to stop and enjoy as much as I wanted, but this time I did. Now when I got out of the van, of course the button on my jeans flew right off. It got sewn up right there in the parking lot while they were still on me which gave all the onlookers something to talk about before service.

We went to this church that had free delicious orange drink and donuts that you could eat before, during and after service. I have never seen this before in my life and I think it’s just the greatest thing. Also the sermon started with a Jim Carey video clip on a projector screen and I have never seen this kind of technology used in a church before, just old fashioned overhead projectors and not even free water. After there was a question and answer time. This is the most modern church I’ve ever seen.

Any way to my main story. Back in like grade 6 there was a beautiful girl name Maryanne. We called her psycho bitch because she used to beat us up, put caterpillars down our shirt and squish them. Every time we would see her, we would run away because of all her roughhousing. This was crazy because we (the boys) would roughhouse as well. I mean back then we would light things on fire and cause all kinds of mischief, but we couldn’t handle being beaten up by a beautiful girl.

I became a Christian at age 17, and I lost contact with Maryanne a few years prior, although I would hear about her once in a while because she dated some of my close friends.

When I was in college and doing an internship around age 19, I met her again at Tim Hortons. She was a cashier and just had a round of chemotherapy. She had cancer and had lost all her hair from the treatment. She was smiling at me while holding back tears. “I’ll never have children” she said. Without thinking (story of my life) I told her that Jesus would heal her, and tried to tell her as much as I could about my new found faith before I had to go (there were other customers in the line). I gave her my contact information.

I make promises to people all the time. Most of the time I come through, sometimes I don’t. When I tell people about Jesus though, I really boast. I boast big. And I had boasted big about Jesus to Maryanne in front of other people. When I got home I almost started to panic, because I realized I promised this girl that Jesus would come through for her and that one day she would have kids.

Fast forward to right now, several years later. I had just picked up a Medium pizza with Nathan and when we were walking outside of the mall in front of Price Chopper, I hear a scream “asif, asif!”. Maryanne ran up to me and before I had a chance to react, she jumped on me, arms and legs wrapped around me completely. I was surprised my spine didn’t collapse. All the weight lifting has been working out. Her hair is long and beautiful, in fact she’s more beautiful than I remember.

She went on to Nathan about how great of a man I am. (She and Nathan had never met prior). She really went on. And of course I’m not, but God is so great He came through for both me and Maryanne. I wish everyone who was in the Tim Hortons years prior could see. Both of us grew up in tough environments. Both of us came up from the wrong side of the tracks. Both of us have been healed by Jesus.

And yes, she now has a beautiful biological son. I write these journals so that I can one day read them again. But this story doesn’t require a journal entry. I’ll remember it for eternity.

15 kids and counting

When you have children in your full time care, you have to get used to:

1.) misplaced everything. Prescription glasses, keys, cellphone, batteries, everything you need will be missing. EVERYTHING. They play with everything. They see you touch something, they want to touch it. You tell them not to touch something, they want to touch it. I’m still trying to trick them into using the vacuum.

2.) everything is covered in slime. Children produce a natural disgusting slime (okay okay not really) and they cover everything in this slime. My clothes, my car, my keyboard, monitor, you name it. I go to church with spit up on my shirts and pants, boogers cover all my possessions. There are boogers on my eyeglasses right now.

3.) being tired all the time, yet having adrenaline enough to do anything you need to do.

4.) having no available cash left over because they need something (or they broke something or lost something and you have to buy a new one).

5.) privacy no longer exists. There is a child hiding under a table, in a cupboard, under a bed, in a closet. There is a teen sitting so quietly in the corner you don’t even know they are there. They hear every fart and every prayer.

6.) birthdays, Christmas, etc involves me giving out money so presents can be purchased for me.

I love it. 15 kids so far, yes fifteen. Not bad asif. Now to get a wife and start making some biological ones :)

Nadine is 6 years old, she loves to collect frogs in a jar and bring them in the house, I told her to stop doing both of those things. Did Nadine fill a jar with 100 baby frogs (she counted) and then bring them into the house and accidentally drop the jar, spilling live frogs all over the floor? Yes!

While yelling at her about this, I accidentally call her Renee, she points to a 5 year old on the sofa “Asif I’m Nadine, that’s Renee.”

I fell asleep on the sofa and woke up with an armpit filled with ketchup. What I’ve learned is, don’t try to fight it, just enjoy it while you can.

On another note, N and I was driving down Steeles Ave and we saw these 2 small children, maybe ages 5-6 trying to flag down drivers. So we stopped to see what was going on, it was actually a young father and his 2 children, the father had walked away for a second. They had come here for camping in the Etobicoke area (near that campground around Wild Water Kingdom) and had somehow ended up far away while running errands. They reminded me of those “end of the world survivor” type families. I know a few. Anyway, we drove them back to the campground since we were actually headed that way. Made sure everything was okay and then left.

More than 100 children and 20 call me dad

Okay, so here’s a fun twist to my life. My friends approached me asking if I wanted to go garbage picking, and I laughed and laughed. They were serious though, so I went with them to see what was going on, you know if I should check them into the local loony bin or what.

We drove to Oakville, this super gorgeous city with beautiful women jogging on the sidewalk (in Malton, you don’t see this, you usually see people running for their life). Anyway in Oakville, once a year they do this cool thing where people can put their used items on the curb, for other people to come and take. Not garbage, but actually useful items like furniture, electronics and nic nacs. The reason this is great for us is that we know people who need things for their home, and we can’t afford to pay for all of that stuff out of our own pockets but we can spend time looking through items on hundreds of curbs and pick out the items.

We found some great treasures including working computers, tvs, and of course furniture.

We found a beautiful solid wood office desk, that was way too heavy but so nice we didn’t want to leave it. We knew who we would be giving it to and were excited to get it there. Nathan and I had to take this thing in the elevator up 3 floors and then down a long hallway, and then up a narrow flight of stairs and we were wondering how we would do that last part, this desk might have been several hundred pounds with no real place to hold it while taking it up the stairs. When we got to the location a young black teen was standing around outside in the dark and to my amazement asked if we needed help.

This surprised me, at first I figured he was one of my former kids who was now a teen but I couldn’t recognize him at all. I didn’t want to say anything though because if he was one of my kids and I couldn’t remember, then he would be hurt and I would feel terrible. It’s fair to say that I’ve worked closely with over 100 children and teens at this point, and I can’t remember them all. Sometimes I’ll be walking in the mall and they’ll walk up and hug me, most are way taller than me now. Even some of the girls. There’s a young man who comes over for dinner 2-3 nights a week, he’s a tall, muscular super dark skinned black youth. He doesn’t knock, he just finds his way in somehow. I’ll be watching tv, and turn around and there he is. I know he’s from one of the churches, and he’s a good kid. Always listens to me, never causes me any problems.

It took a long time for the 3 of us to get that desk up the stairs, it was really brutal. I was so impressed with this young man that I offered to buy him a whole pizza, and he wasn’t even surprised at all, as if he hung out with me before. We drove him over to 241 and got him a media pizza and some soda, then drove him home. I still have no idea if he’s one of my kids I worked with in the past but anyway, God bless him for being such a help.

Now in Guyana, and other parts of the world, this is how we got most of our possessions: picking through the dump. I remember my first tricycle, right out of the dumpster, and my uncle made 2 solid wooden rear wheels for it that weren’t held on by bolts, so they would wobble as I rode, I loved that bike so much and you know what, it’s still being used today. I have a photo of me riding it in my underwear and it’s one of my favorite memories.

I lied to peel children aid and so did everyone else

There’s a bad man we all know and put up with, and he beats his wife and children. Everyone knows it. They don’t know it because someone told them, they know it because they aren’t morons. His wife used to show up with black eyes and bruises, saying she ran into a door (do all women use this excuse?) and his children would sometimes let it slip that their dad beats them. To be clear, this was all in 2001, during very difficult times when much was going on all at once.

Back in 2001 before I moved to Ottawa I was asked in haste, after a long day of work to give a reference for this person, to save his life really, more so begged to give him a good reference. He promised he was a changed man, so I gave a quick “he’s not so bad, this whole thing has been blown out of proportion” type reference. This saved his sorry ass, and later I would find out that he was 10x worst than I thought.

Growing up, I myself fell through the cracks as did many of my friends. Daily punches, cuts on bruises all over. Bloody noses, bumps on my head were normal. Peel police would get to know me by name, and I would get to know some of them by name, since they were at my house so often.

Good teachers would often ask about cuts and bruises and I would make up excuses, and my friends who were in the same situation would trade war stories.

Girls always had it 100 times worst though, and their war stories were the worst. Being abused by their moms boyfriends while being videotaped or prostituted out by their crack head moms to strangers. It made me and my guy friends think that things weren’t really so bad for us after all. We got used to seeing social services and hearing and saying lies upon lies. You’d visit a friends house and social services would show up, or you’d visit my house and the police would show up. I wouldn’t even invite someone to my house until I knew what their home life was. If they had a good home life, they wouldn’t be invited to mine because they wouldn’t understand. Same with them, I couldn’t be invited to some peoples house until they knew what mine was like.

White people, black people, brown people, everyone had it rough in one way or another. In grade 7 I kept a photo of a picture perfect home in my pocket, looking at it to make me happy. One time in grade 7 I was planning on teaching this one bully a lesson as I was known to do, and my super duper awesome teacher Mrs. Prates told us all that we should be nice to him, a young thug, because his dad beats him, and we hazed her because we were all being beaten but he was the only wimp that let the teachers know. Mrs. Prates is one of my favorite teachers to this day, but this was all way over her head.

When I was 7 I slept with a heavy metal flashlight, by the time I was 11 I slept with a trusty switchblade. By the time I was 13 I had several weapons. One time my boss at Pickwicks Potatoes drove me home from Dr. Fleas Flea Market and there were 4 police cruisers at my house. It shocked the crap out of him, a middle aged Jew, but me, a 13 year old Muslim had a list of about 75 great excuses as to why they were there and I said my lie with a smile and went back to work the next weekend as if nothing happened. It was the only way to survive at the time.

About 2 years later I stopped smiling. My list of great excuses began to anger me, I was getting older and growing, but things were very much the same at home. One very early morning I woke up hearing the angry screamings of my mom and her boyfriend, and I figured I would save the police another trip to our house by taking care of the situation myself. I grabbed my trusty Louisville slugger, and kicked down her door swinging the bat at both of them, and I clearly threatened to kill them both. My exact words were something along the lines of “I’m going to kill you, and I’m going to kill you, if you don’t stop this crap and grow the f up.” Now for those of you who know me, you know I don’t use that kind of language under normal circumstance. There’s just something about family that brings out the crazy in everyone.

There’s a sort of freedom you gain when you threaten to kill someone and really mean it. And I’m not joking, I would have actually killed them both that warm summer morning, and lived happily ever after knowing I made the world a better place. To be fair, I now know that her life was much harder than mine.

Fast forward to today, we’ve all given our life to Jesus, my moms home is the place ALL my friends like to hang out. There’s peace, joy, food, laughter, fun stories (ask her about the time I ate my own poo) and just general goodwill. Shes known as the super cool mom and I’m known as the lucky son. She takes in everyone, all the teens in town and there’s always fun stories and joy to be had. Just a few nights ago she called me asking if I can help her out, she took out several teen girls and boys bowling or something like that, and there was some project they wanted to do that would really help them out but cost too much. The teens were super excited and I was really happy to be a part of it all. Only Jesus can spark these kinds of changes.

I heard in the news that churches are in decline in Canada because people no longer believe in God. This is a lie. This is a complete lie made up by liberal media and the liberal government. Churches are in decline in Canada because people do believe in God, and they are scared out of their mind that if they or their children go to church, people will find out what’s going on in their homes. An atheists worst nightmare is when they will one day face the God they’ve been pretending to not believe in. But we’re all going to have to face Him one day.

Cocaine and cocaine related problems

If you live in Malton, you will at some point be exposed to drugs. Probably weed by grade 6, and harder drugs by high school. Girls will get introduced to drugs earlier, because boys use drugs to get sex from girls in high school. Girls do drugs to impress boys, it’s a vicious cycle, plus add in the fact that there aren’t as many fathers and mothers as their should be and everything is crazy in this country. I mean we live in a great country but we are allowed to kill innocent babies but we aren’t allowed to kill baby rapists? Is there any wonder so many people do drugs?

Anyway, when I was around age 14 my friend Steve and I walked up and down Airport road, applying at every single place for a job. We were well dressed and walked for hours, pretty much an entire day down one side of the road and up another side. Airport Road becomes Dixon Road after a while, we walked further than that!

We applied at offices, gyms, even Hooters. We applied to several Mcdonalds. Steve used to make home made popsicles and sell them in his townhouse complex and I had my small businesses running as well, plus an idea for a game called goodmitten, it would be a better version of badmitton. We just really needed steady employment because of our life responsibilities.

It was rather obvious that nobody was going to hire us because we were young, and although I had a small business at the time it wasn’t bringing in enough money to support my needs and family.

Steve then got an offer to deal acid / LSD on Goreway Drive near Brandongate and he asked if I wanted in. We talked about it for about an hour. The money was a big draw, you could make several hundred everyday just in a small area, the territory would be protected for us so we wouldn’t fear gang wars. We decided to sleep on it, and the next day concluded that neither of us would do it, we would just try to be successful in business and try even harder to get jobs. We must have applied at almost every Mcdonalds in Mississauga and Brampton, possibly some in Etobicoke as well.

What kind of drug dealer would I be? I’d give away the drugs for free, and to those who couldn’t pay. And if I made a profit it would go into missions work. LOL. I’d be the kindest, gentlest drug dealer in Canada – and probably the quickest to die and the most made fun of.

You see drug deals take place here, especially at the schools. People aren’t generally shy about it, and a lot of people are armed. Systems are in place to prevent getting caught. If you want to buy a small amount of drugs, you go to a local high school, you can get any drug in a high school. I’m surprised there aren’t more video cameras and police officers in high school.

I’ve actually witnessed a massive multi million $ drug bust but I can’t talk about it here, plus the details are fuzzy anyway.

Anyway fast forward to today, Nathan and I were in my old Neon, the car was in park, but on, and a drunk man in a van, who was driving too fast anyway, hit the backside of my car going in the opposite direction. He got out of his van, stinking of booze and started yelling at us that us youngsters do too much “crack cocaine”. I assured him that I have never had involvement with the stuff and felt good of my clear conscience.

Go for it

I started the year by bidding on 2 consulting projects, and I was rejected by the one that would have made me filthy rich, as was expected, and accepted for the one that will simply help to put food on the table and help me conclude some missions projects I’ve been wanting to finish up this year.

I always try for things that are out of my league.

When I was 14 I applied for a young entrepreneurs loan / grant and was declined (I was later told that in Canada you “need to have money in order to get money.”) lolol what?

When I was 15 I converted a bedroom in my basement into an office. I couldn’t afford a desk so I used 2 empty cardboard boxes as a base, and a sheet of plywood as a desk surface, painted blue. I didn’t have a chair so I sat on the floor. I put free ads in the paper and I had customers come over almost everyday. Most were very impressed at my gumption, shocked by my young age and delighted by my high quality work. Very few people were offended by my obvious poverty (one man laughed at me and walked right out but that was rare) and I got a lot of great new clients through recommendations. (I took on a few small investors to raise capital and things moved along slowly and steadily. By 1997 the investors received their money back plus several times more in profit. It was a happy time for us all.)

When I was 15 I had a competitor call to complain that he was losing customers to me and might consider suing me. Later I ended up getting a job offer from that competitor.

When I was 16 I bid for a tech project and won a partial contract worth $600,000 but I couldn’t get the financing to fill the order and had to give up the contract. I tried though. I applied for a business loan at the bank, and they approved it almost on the spot because of the contract but then found out I was 16 years old, and retracted the offer. The banker was shocked, she thought I was in my 20’s based on the way I spoke, plus I was dressed in the nicest gray wool suit which was I got used. I knew they couldn’t give a loan of any size to someone under 18, I knew this going in, but it was worth trying.

When I was 17 I had several people bidding for equity in one of my start-up projects. The highest bid was $300,000 plus full time employment, but to be fair this was during the dot com boom, everyone was getting these kinds of offers. The very day I turned 18 years old, banks had extended me $10,000 in credit and by the time I was 20 I had a $250,000 line of credit. I didn’t apply for it, they simply gave it to me.

I would later receive a job offer with one of the major investment banks.

By age 21 I was invited to participate in a massive class action lawsuit against one of the major investment banks that made us all lose a lot of money. Talk about adventure!

Rewind further, when I was in grade school, my grandma would force me to go to school even on holidays. Even on a snow day. I would explain to her that the doors would be locked and nobody would be there, but she would make me prepare for school, and walk there anyway just to be sure. Each time I would walk all the way to school and the doors would be locked and I would walk back home. It was frustrating, but learning how to deal with frustration so young and it really helps me out today. These days entrepreneurs quit after a few hard days.

As a child I was gunning for projects and goals that most adults won’t go for. I remember when I was 10 years old and living in the crackhead townhouses at Brandongate Drive, a man on Rockhill Road was selling an offset printing machine and I bid $250 of my own newspaper money to buy it, thinking I could start my own printing business in my garage. He wanted $5,000. I tried to cut him an equity deal. Yes, at age 10 I tried to give him a percentage of my company. He didn’t go for it. But that’s not the best part – I didn’t know which house was his, only that he lived on Rockhill.

When I heard that other people were going there to look at the machine I took my step dads car keys, turned on his car, (as I remember it a 70’s or 80’s vw rabbit) and backed it out of the driveway. I was going to drive over there. 10 years old. The local gangsters who were doing their business (selling stolen goods) saw me and were like “wow” and I came to my senses that this was a bad idea and put the car back. I ran over to Rockhill Road and knocked on every single door on the street one by one till I found him, he lived like halfway in. In a way I wish I still had that kind of gumption today.

By 2001 I had overseen over $4,000,000 USD of quality equity buy in companies like Amazon before the dot com bubble burst on us all.

Some projects have failed miserably, others have succeeded very well, others were fairly normal.

Anyway, to the next topic: I’ve just discovered Christian rap! If you like clean rap music then check out people like Dr. Cheddar, Prime Minister, Cross Movement and FTF. But please don’t steal the music from the web, just go to a cd store and buy a copy! There’s a cd store in every mall.

You wouldn’t believe me anyway

Due to a computer failure, I’ve lost over 50 good journal entries. To complicate the situation, the website that I used to post my entries on has gone bankrupt and shut down. These entries told of my many, many great adventures like being stabbed at, almost blown up by a fire bomb, plus fun things like camping and visiting Lake Huron and eating dinner by a campfire. I also lost a lot of photos that I took with a digital camera. :( which means a lot of these things will become distant memories later on.

The internet is really growing, and technology is advancing a lot but I kind of miss some of the good old ways which were more secure.

I’m ending 2002 the right way, with prayer and fasting. And boy do I need the fasting! If not that, then bigger pants. Ha-ha, okay seriously, I watched Lord of the Rings part 2, gave away a ton of cool Christmas presents again, had 7 children under my care, petted a bunny rabbit, fed a candy cane to a bunny rabbit, went golfing, failed at building a go cart, failed at adding a motor to my mountain bike, and so much more.

2002 has been a good year, full of wonderful family and friends time, trips to New York and great lakes. Swimming and laughing and eating, what more can a person ask for? Oh – and there’s a redhead at church that my friends and I are all trying to talk to, I talked to her last week while my friends distracted her family for me, things are in motion!

I ate 400 slices of pizza in 300 days and now I’m a fatso

If you read my Ottawa Adventures series of posts (see 2001) then you know that I was struggling for several months financially and wasn’t eating properly because I couldn’t afford to. To be fair, I grew up mostly not eating enough because we couldn’t afford to, and was 96.5lbs up to the year 2001. Sickly most of the time as well.

This year has been good to me financially (and in many other ways). Because of the lack of pizza last year, I ate 400 slices this year so far, over and above my other meals, and I’ve gained 65lbs. It’s mostly fat but some of it is muscle because I’ve been lifting weights and working out. I’ve got stretch marks on my legs, biceps and shoulders even though I have a slim build overall. My stomach unfortunately is 42″ and has no stretch marks. I’ll cut back on the pizza now, which should help me cut back on my stomach. In high school I was called Mr. Abs and spaghetti arms, looking at me now you’d never know it.

Food is needed often. You don’t technically have to have it every day but after a while, you’ll die without it. Growing up my stomach was usually growling with hunger pains. Some of my friends as well. We’d be at school and would dread when there would be silence in class because then you could hear our stomachs growling for food. In grade 1, 2 and 3 at Yorkview Public School I would rarely ever have a lunch. They had a system back then that all the kids who didn’t have food would get food from the kids who did have food. It was a good system. One person would give an apple, another would give half of a sandwich. If you were lucky someone would share their chips with you.

In middle school things were a bit better for a short while, but then by high school things got rough again. My friends would often times share their lunches with me and I would get invited to dinner almost every night which was amazing for me. At my house we ate rice, and curry. At my friends house we would eat every kinds of food imaginable. I’m even convinced I ate horse meat but I can’t be 100% sure because my friends have been known to trick me. One time I was invited over to my friend Sandy’s house for lunch and her and my friend Carla slipped some booze into my orange soda, which upset me because I wasn’t into that sort of stuff. I had too many responsibilities to also be a drunkard.

I remember art class the most, because it was one of the quietest classes plus one of my favorites. My stomach would growl and growl and my table mates would chuckle. I was a real starving artist.

I ended up getting so frustrated with poverty that I dropped out of high school to pursue business, figuring if I waited till after college I’d die of starvation anyway.

Things were different in Ottawa. I was starving, for just about 3 months maybe. But I didn’t care. It was no big deal because every since I gave my life to Jesus in 1997, my life has been filled with fresh purpose, so things like food don’t bother me. If I have it, I have it. If I don’t, then it’s just a minor frustration.

Spiritual food, well you need that to and I have a lot of that. God provides us all with a lot. He says in the Bible that creation itself declares God’s glory, and the universe declares His majesty.

When I was a kid, I missed out on pretty much everything. When I was a teen I missed out on a lot, as I got older I learned that you have to miss out either right now, to gain later on, or you can get something right now, and later on live in regret. I’d rather sacrifice now, and gain later on.

In Ottawa, for about a month, my diet was hot peppers. Why? I had a bag of hot peppers in my freezer, and nothing else. I’m going to enjoy my big fat stomach and smile every time I see it.

Checkout these cool Canadian films: Flowers and Garnet, Blood and Donuts, Road to Avonlea.

I love New York and America!

I’ve been to New York many times. Some of my favorite memories include the Jamaica Avenue street vendors who will sell you anything, for almost any price. In the early 90’s I purchased a cassette tape of MC Hammer for $2 USD. Here’s how that went down.

Asif: do you have MC Hammer?
Vendor: Yes, wait here.
Vendor then immediately abandons his cart of cassette tapes with me, age 10-11 approx and runs down the crowded street. He was gone for a good couple of minutes and came back with the tape. Dude should have charged me $25 for all the work he did.

These days I go to New York for business and I don’t find anything to be cheap anymore. I had to sign a contract and get it to its destination and my pen ran out of ink, so I stopped into a stationary store to get the cheapest pen I could find – $20 for 1 pen!

After the September 11 attacks in New York, getting into the USA has been a little harder for me. I went to New York recently and they stopped us at the border, had bomb sniffing dogs sniff through my car, and had me remove all the items from the car. I was questioned about why I had so many bibles (because I give them away to people who give their life to Jesus) and why I had so much cash on me ($500 USD). They were obviously looking for a reason. People like that are dumb. The worst part actually, I mean the most uncomfortable part of this was that 99.9% of the people stopped at the border were colored people. Look I completely understand the need for this and to be extra safe, but come on.

The ultra rudeness of the lady behind the counter was almost unbearable. She was nasty on a level that I couldn’t understand, she was speaking to me as if I was her personal enemy. She didn’t ask me where I was going, where I was staying, what business I would be conducting, she asked questions that I had no answer for. She asks “what’s your fathers name Asif?” And of course I have no clue what his name is, I never met the guy – so I tell her this and this made her very angry. She screamed at me in front of everyone about how suspicious it was that I didn’t know my fathers name, and so loudly that a supervising officer probably felt bad for me and he simply shut her up and let me into the USA with an apologetic face. After that I’ve been going without any issue.

Mission 3:16

My rant: When it comes to business I’m old fashioned. Develop a good product or service, and sell sell sell. I don’t like these magic vitamin companies or multi level marketing schemes or businesses that simply make money by recruiting people and have no real product or service. I can’t believe that smart people join up with these things, and I can’t believe they think I’m so stupid that I’ll join up with them. No, I don’t want to sell your magic vitamins. No, I don’t want to recruit for your multi level marketing business. No, I don’t want to pay $500 to sign up for your business venture. LOL. People fail and they want to drag others down with them.

I spent the day with some friends at a gigantic antique shop, which was out in the middle of nowhere. I mean it. There was a large mall sized antique / flea market style shop with over 100 vendors, and beside it a small bakery, and then nothing else for miles. I know this because I purchased a treat from the bakery, then walked a far way in both directions hoping to find something else. So I really had no choice but to spend the day antiquing, since…well they drove me here. There was some really neat stuff though. I was looking for an antique umbrella but couldn’t find one and I bought some nic nacs that I’ll give away the first chance I get.

Last year June – December I didn’t get to do as much missions work as I wanted and that wore heavy on my heart. Don’t get me wrong I always do as much as I can, but this year so far has been the opposite, I’ve clearly made up for all the missions opportunities I missed out on last year.

So far:
I sent a soon to be police officer on a life changing mission trip to South America
Helped a small orphanage do some much needed repairs
Participated in the digging of several fresh water wells
Helped a new church

My friends and I live in Malton, and a lot of people here have guns or easy access to guns. Unfortunately this includes teens. Well one day we went to play baseball after work and noticed a bunch of young black teens hanging around watching us, so I invited them to play with us, which they gladly did.

I can understand people carrying around handguns, but some teens carry around sawed off shotguns, and I met one young man who had a grenade. I didn’t bother asking if it was real, because I learned that curiosity killed the cat. Interestingly enough it’s not just males that are armed, females as well! Anyway you know me, each person got an invitation to church – and I’ve witnessed weapons surrendered to local authorities because of a new life surrendered to Christ. Although I can’t share details on everything, (partially because I can’t remember all the details anymore) just last year I participated in a youth event that saw more than 30 firearms handed over to the police.

Goreway Drive Adventures

If you live in Malton, you will have adventures by simply walking the length of Goreway Drive. I don’t recommend that you do this at night though, you will be assaulted. Still safer than Darcel Ave at night, lol you’ll get shot at or stabbed and definitely robbed!

Back in I guess 1996 I went to this dinner party hangout thingy, I don’t know how I ended up there because I really don’t go to these kinds of things. As far as I remember, a girlfriend forced me to go. It was so beyond boring. While I was there I was introduced to someone in the same work field as me, and I said “oh it’s nice to meet a competitor and colleague.” I was a teen at the time, and he was a man in his late 20’s early 30’s. He laughed at me out loud and said something along the lines of “ha ha ha you think we are in the same league? I’m competing with X (list giant corporations here).” I was really embarrassed about this because everyone laughed at me when I was simply trying to be respectful to the man.

Several years later Steve and I were walking south on Goreway Drive to get Mcdonalds and I crossed paths with this same fellow. He saw me and looked to the ground and tried to keep walking, but I stopped him because I wanted a quick stop-n-chat. It had been several years now and I wanted to hear about his many great successes because I had several successes under my belt also.

Unfortunately not long after the 1996 incident, his company took a nose dive. Lost all their money, their office space was repossessed, everything gone. No big deal, I’ve been there. Most people have.

A few days later I received a notice that I could purchase out some of the assets which would help to alleviate this persons bankruptcy. But I declined, after all, we really weren’t in the same league.

Also on Goreway Drive there are men looking to have dates with other men, it’s really weird to be propositioned while simply walking down the sidewalk. If you go to like, Brandongate Drive there will be pimps selling out underage girls, and if you go to Morning Star pimps will be selling out older women (there are sometimes lineups of 10-20 ladies, they don’t even try to hide it) but on Goreway there will be older men who will say “hi want to go get some coffee? or “want to checkout my new car?”.

Now Goreway Drive has many of the major stores people go to, not just the mall but also gas station, convenience stores, fast food stores and misc. Have you ever gotten offered a job dealing drugs, or moving drugs just by walking down the street? I have, on Goreway drive. And many others have been offered as well. (of course I never accepted, and I’ve never been involved in the drug trade in any way). Now when you decline such a job, you have to do it with finesse, or you can get shot. It’s not unusual to see a tactical unit with shotguns drawn or one person pointing a firearm at someone else.

Just the other day Nathan and I were walking towards Etude Drive when we saw a man pointing a gun at a girl, we both ran towards them (because we are both insane) but before we had a chance the girl got into the mans car and they drove away. Typical Malton BS. It was white people to, so for those of you reading thinking that it was black people, not this time :)

I hate summer

If you’re reading this and you know me, then you know that I’m a workaholic. I’ve been battling this for years. As soon as the sun rises, I like to be up and working. As soon as the sun sets, I finish up for the day. In the summer the days are long, and so I work as long as it’s bright outside. This leads to burnout, and so I’ve begun to hate summer. I’ve actually ruined relationships simply because I’ve been too busy to care about anything else. When I was younger this problem was worst, I would actually skip occasional nights of sleep – I mean entire nights, just so I could work more and get ahead. I don’t have that kind of energy anymore so I do sleep a full night for the most part.

Over the last few years I’ve gotten really involved in digging fresh water wells in third world countries and the costs are so variable. In one place a well can cost $2,500 because you don’t have to dig very deep, in other places $300,000 or more depending on the engineering and machinery involved. I used to have a goal of like 10,000 fresh water wells but when I realized how impossible that number was I lowered it to like 1,000 and I think I’ll just lower this to like 100 or less because it’s such an uphill struggle. If it was the only thing in my life I could put more energy into it, but as I’m typing this, I’m also holding a baby and tonight we are going to help someone move.

I really hate summer.

Whining about wine

I did something I really regret now. Years go (in the 90’s) I was given, as a gift, about a dozen bottles of vintage wine. I was a teen, I didn’t drink wine at the time, I didn’t understand that wine 50 – 75 or more years old would be so valuable and highly sought after. Those wines stayed in a cupboard for a few years then one day I thought to myself “who drinks old wine? that’s so gross, I want fresh wine even though I don’t drink it”. So I threw them out.

My friends are also making fun of me because a few years back we went camping and I threw a steak in the campfire, but that’s a completely different story.

I’m a minimalist. That means I like to have the minimum amount of stuff. I don’t like clutter, I have 2 pairs of shoes, and when I feel overwhelmed one of the first things I do (aside from pray) is start throwing things out and giving things away.

Jules is about 7 months old and he woke up around 230am with a fever and crying. I made him a bottle and it was obvious he wasn’t feeling well. I took time to pray with him and we did some webcamming with my night owl friends. Everyone loves a beautiful baby. Jules was born with drugs and alcohol in his system thanks to his mom. He’s severely underweight but he’s been getting healthier and healthier because he’s surrounded by people who give him lots of love, affection and prayer. After he was nice and happy he went back to sleep AND SO DID I.

June is fathers day and the last few years I’ve been getting fathers day greetings from children who’s lives I’ve been a part of, who don’t have fathers. I even get cards once in a while which is sweet.

On another note, Patrick was being super good, so I promised to buy him a car when he turns 18. Everyone heard, so I’ll probably be held to this promise. Good thing he’s still a baby :)

Ottawa visits

You should read my Adventures in Ottawa posts before this one. So 6 of my friends and I crammed into a mini van and took an impromptu day trip to -Ottawa. We visited cool places like Carlingwood Mall, some of my super cool Ottawa friends and of course took the Parliament Tour. I got a jumbo garlic pretzel with salt, as is my custom and then we headed back home. Fun day, and I don’t do these kinds of things often enough. There was no Ottawa magic for me on this trip, my wounds are still healing from last year, especially the fact that I had little to no real food for a few months towards the end. One month I ate mostly potatoes which I prepared every which way, and the next month bread and margarine which I purchased with my pennies. And finally hot peppers which my friends are still talking about, which I’m sure they’ll be talking about for many years to come, and rightfully so. What an adventure.

I chat with my Ottawa friends via the web almost everyday, and now I get to chat with most of my missionary friends online to. It’s so cool to not have to wait several weeks for letters in the mail. And we attach photos online to. Also I’m concerned that some of my letters have gotten lost in the mail, and some countries don’t even have reliable mail service, but internet is starting to become reliably available even in the harshest 3rd world countries, at least in major cities. One of my missions friends writes her letters to me on paper, then sends them with a team leader to the city, where the team leader types it up in an email and sends it to me. When she / they get back to Toronto though, that’s the best!